Today, my brother and I drove 3 hours to pick up our puppy. The woman we bought him from said not to put him in the cage for the ride home as he would pee for sure. She recommended I put him on my lap. Not only did he shit on the seat backing out of her driveway, he pissed on me an hour later. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, we were in the car with my puppy, who favours my sister. She had been sat on her lap for a while, when she stood up and climbed onto my lap. I was really pleased until she peed on me and then went straight back to my sister. FML
Today, my dog pooped. In my lap. While I was driving. FML
Today, I adopted a dog from the local shelter. I put the dog in the car and he was shedding everywhere, but I was ok with that because he was my dog. As I pulled into the parking lot, the dog began to poop in the backseat of my car. When I got him out of the car, he ran off. $100 for him to poop and run away. FML
Today, I was in the car with my mom taking the dog to the vet, when he peed on me. We were taking him there because he hadn't peed in three days. FML
Today, I took my car into a car wash. I guess it was a bad idea to do it with my dog in the car, because he freaked out, started scrambling around, and ended up pissing on everything, me included. FML
Today, on the way home from the dog groomer, my great Dane had a bout of diarrhea in the car. I slammed on the brakes and my other freshly shampooed dog slid off the seat and into the pile of crap. FML
Today, I got a ride in a friend's car. As I sat down, her younger brother started laughing hysterically from the backseat. In between giggles, he admitted he peed there a few minutes ago. FML
Today, I took my dog to the vet. He sat on my lap the whole car ride, licking my face and acting like my best friend. As soon as we got inside, he turned into a Tasmanian devil and pissed on my shoes, all while looking at me like I'd betrayed him. FML
Today, I made sure my puppy went number 1 and 2 before taking them into a pet-friendly store. In the store, two ladies awed at my puppy, but as I picked him up I didn't notice he'd shat on the floor until they pointed it out, giving me a dirty look. Other customers glared as I picked up his smeared shit. FML
Today, I brought my new puppy home. I saw her sniffing around, so I took her outside to do her business. She simply played in the grass for ten minutes, so I brought her in. She walked in the door, squatted, and shit. She has diarrhea. This is the fourth time today. FML
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Top comments
Buttsexpirate 9
Seems like urine a bad place so you probably need a cool down. But hey it's Christmas and puppies are awesome!
margie2194 12
Hey at least you have an adorable puppy for the holidays. Happy holidays, love!
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Comments (95)
lalamike25 0
I just got 2 dogs yesterday too. One's mostly trained to go outside for that shit and the other one pretty much is too :) 8 weeks old with 1 day of training
awalker2782 5
Welcome to the land of responsibility. Don't worry it'll only happen another 20 times or so
kaykay20 0
Should have used a towel or blanket to cover yourself and your car..she did warn you before hand
fogrunner 13
Don't breed or buy while homeless die...
mbrooks5110 0
Stop buying dogs millions, yes millions, are put to sleep in shelters every year. There are puppies, pure breads & whatever else you could want.
ame_franky 0
puppies can't control their bladders well and when their nervous and in a new place it's harder. I'm sure the puppy was just as embarrassed. I hope you took good care of him after
raaacheel 4
Not his fault):
damonlover_nikki 0
Did the women not like you or something , she basically said " hey this puppy will surely pee on the ride home so why don't you just put him in your lap" wth
jklane0909 0
That's what puppies do. Get used to it.
st3phr0 2
Its just a baby puppy, what did u expect for It not to shit or pee for the looonnng drive back home??? YDI