Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML
Today, I was lying naked on my boyfriend's bed for the first time ever. He glanced at me, then started playing with a Rubik's cube. FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. He didn't know how to take off my bra and insisted that he'd figure it out on his own. He gave up a couple of seconds later and played video games instead. FML
Today, was the first time giving head to my boyfriend. He couldn't finish, so I tried a handjob. In the end he kind of pushed my hand away so he could finish himself off. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pocket. Turns out he'd written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited, and in the end the only thing that blew up was him, saying, "Oh my god, just stop it already." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
The_Instigator 11
That damned Rubiks Cube, I've still never solved one.
yamatelle 19
OP, Rubik's Cubes are like penises. The more you play with them the harder they get.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (171)
RawrNom 0
atleast you're getting some, focus on the nice part not the leaving you hanging part aha :)
gunner2590 0
Next time you're going down on him stop near the end and say you just remembered there's a shoe sale online.
HomeAl0ne 20
I can just see him thinking to himself "Top, top, bottom, bottom, middle, left, right.....hey, wait a minute, that gives me an idea! Where's that Rubik's Cube?"
michael509 1
You should have said you Know how to
MrTall 5
You should try out the bra from my pic, he might be interested in you if you wore it
justme0003 6
go, get up, help him solve it , and let him finish u... then leave him for the rest of ur life...he sucks!
HunterAlpha1 8
nerds FTW!
andanotherthing 4
Time to dump that loser, hon. He might be ok as a friend but as a lover, he's got to go.
sochaboy 0
Twat swatted
walrusman 0
Did u finish?