Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Rush of gas
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. When we finished, he mentioned that he made me queef. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I actually farted during sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML
Today, while at family dinner, my boyfriend got drunk and told my entire family the things I do in bed. FML
Great handle!
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML
Today, my mother and girlfriend were joking around and talking about the embarrassing things I've done. After they'd had a lengthy conversation, my girlfriend mentioned, "And he always farts during sex." FML
Damn, son
Today, I was at a barbeque with my family, my boyfriend, and some mutual acquaintances. Someone jokingly called my boyfriend a pussy, to which he loudly replied, "I guess I am what I eat!" My mother was sitting across from us. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML
Let it all out
Today, my hubby thought he made me queef during sex. I was too embarrassed ro tell him it was a fart I was holding in, but couldn’t once I orgsmed. FML
Top comments
FFML_314 12
Your boyfriend is an arsehole.
ThegiantNinja 0
Seriously, some of you talk like you're still stuck in prepuberty. Especially #26. A "queef" is nothing more but trapped air which gets out. There is not even any fragrance to it. Therefore it does have NOTHING to do with hygienics. There should be mandatory IQ tests for individuals wanting to use the internet. Just like a driver license.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (179)
stevenburnsred 0
thats probably one of the funniest things ive ever heard!
drrumbe02 3
that is hot no queef means is too loose
Sindy_fml 4
132 - it could, depending on the girl
heynicebeard11 0
116 holy shit they've been married 30 years and have never had sex?! that's impossible.
Contra 0
Naturally, if you wait until marriage you are not going to queef and sex will suddenly become wonderful! Honestly, give the OP a break.
ArtemisRising 0
I really wish more emphasis would be put on people learning about their bodies. No, the air in a woman's ****** has nothing to do with the size of a man's penis. It also has absolutely nothing to do with hygiene. When a woman is aroused her uterus naturally expands and pulls upwards. It's called the tenting (or ballooning) effect. Look it up if you don't believe me. Now, the action of sex may not help the fact, but I'm not too sure about its exact roles, but whether you have intercourse or not, there is air if you become aroused enough. Either way, it's got to escape somehow, and sometimes certain positions push more out at once.
ThankfullyNotYou 1
Are you serious? That is so disrespectful all around. Your boyfriend had no right to talk about you like that to his parents and quite frankly it is disgusting that he does. The whole family sounds immature. Seriously, dump his ass and move on. None of those people deserve to reproduce anyway.
TagYourIt 0
zALLLLLLlAllZlllllLalaxo
redsabre 0
this is a classy family... run, run far away!
DaTruth1222 0
haha thats funny... queff... hahahahaha