Today, my boyfriend got a hotel room with a jacuzzi, drinks, and tickets to Six Flags for my birthday. He is currently passed out drunk on the other side of the bed, cursing me out in his sleep. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it was my boyfriend's birthday. After spending a reasonable amount of cash to get us a nice hotel room to celebrate, he decides he would rather spend the night drinking with his friends. They all threw up in the bath tub before passing out on our bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend got so drunk that he was sick in the taxi, sick on me, then sick on himself when he was sitting on the toilet. What's more, I can't get into bed because he's been sick all over my half of the bed. So I'm sleeping on the sofa tonight. FML
Today, my boyfriend came home, chugged a beer, and passed out in our bed without saying hello or goodnight to me. I've been on vacation for a week and was hoping to cuddle. But no, if I try to touch him, he hits me and growls. FML
Today, for my birthday, I got a hotel room for me and my boyfriend. He decided that spending time with a female friend was more important than spending time with me. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend told me he was too busy studying for finals, but that he'd take me out another day instead. He later drunk-dialled me from a party demanding a lift back home. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend made me breakfast in bed, then we went out shopping, had a picnic, watched a good romcom, had a fancy dinner, and ended the day with great sex. And when the clock struck twelve, he dumped me. FML
Today, after a short trip out of town, I came back late at night to the yard clean, the house swept and mopped, all the laundry done, and my son asleep. I was thrilled with my boyfriend, until I found him passed out, covered in spilled beer and piss. FML
Today, my boyfriend turned 21 and got drunk at a bar. Being sober, I went through the whole ordeal: calling a cab, carrying him up three flights of stairs, helping him by the toilet, and taking him to bed. Just when I'm about to sleep, he gets up, pushes his shorts down, and pees on me. Twice. FML
Today, I got a drunken call from my boyfriend, which consisted of him telling me that he, "does man things like fuck bitches and roll with hoes," and that I've been, "trying to turn him into a half-ass girly man," but, "that shit ain't right." Then he threw up. FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
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Top comments
mikeofthunder 13
That isn't a bad attempt OP, he obviously spent a lot of money on you which shows he cares. He's just a bad drunk.
Steve95401 49
Your boyfriend sounds like a real winner.
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Comments (123)
Rodders_SOTC 1
He paid for a hotel room, drinks and tickets so at least he had good.intentions.
SonOfAMitch 14
Go enjoy your birthday in the jacuzzi and have some nice food :) Happy birthday by the way!
ladyluck808 0
ill go to six flags with u...sorry your bf had to ruin your birthday..kick his drunk ass off the bed
SqueakyChipmunk 22
I don't think dogs can go to Six Flags.
TomatoTomauto56 0
Yeah I'm sure you're completely blame free for this. You probably did something to piss him off, and BECAUSE he spent so much time and money on this trip he decided at least he'd have some fun by himself and get drunk. Boo hoo. I bet you deserved it.
SierraaaNicoleee 26
22- If I could like your comment, I would.
UltimateGIRness 16
22- because I can't really like your comment, here's a like for you
PistolWhiper93 0
Sux about what the end result was. Srry OP.
ncvolley123 8
It must be totally awful. Its not like you can make fun of him the next day or anything. So totally **** your life. Ohmergawwddd.
geeves1097 3
He had good intentions.
Melvar_10 3
And your picture describes that love :D
Melvar_10 3
So basically setting yourself up to cheat? You're what's wrong with this world....
Melvar_10 3
ALSO, let's not forget who the **** bought those drinks, hotel room, and tickets....
Melvar_10 3
Too many of you girls are either A. Entitled brats that would ditch him when he clearly wanted to party with his girl B. Over emotional and too stupid to realize alcohol does these things to people and he just got carried away on the drinks when he wanted to party with his girl. So grow up please
DocBastard 40
Wow, as I was reading your comment, I really thought you'd get to the punch line. I got to the end and realised you weren't kidding. "Partying" doesn't mean passing out drunk like a moron. Partying is having fun WITH her. Alcohol does these things to people? Really? NO. People do these things to themselves. Captain Jack is not forcing rum down your throat. Mr. Bud Weiser isn't buying the rounds. When you drink to excess, YOU are to blame. And people like you who try to deflect responsibility piss me right off. The only one who has to grow up here is you, boy. You clearly have NO idea how things really work.
solosohigh 15
you have basically said the same thing in all of your various comments. we got it. yes, alcohol does things to people. however, you are still responsible for your actions. if alcohol makes you act like that, maybe you should drink less, possibly not at all. I hate when people use that as an excuse. if you can't control yourself, don't drink. seems like you're the one who needs to "grow up."