Today, I walked into work looking like I had peed myself, all because my husband thought it would be "hilarious" to slam on the brakes while I was drinking hot coffee. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was rushing to get to work on time and grabbed what I thought was my coffee mug. It wasn't until I was in the car that I realized I had grabbed my husband's urinalysis cup. Not quite the morning boost I was expecting. FML
Today, I was at work and I needed to pee. In my haste, I forgot to lock the door. A coworker walked in on me and I bolted up mid-stream to slam the door back shut. I had pee down my leg and pee squishing in my shoes for the rest of the day. I can still remember his tone of voice, yelling, "Sorry"! FML
Today, I took the bus to work. I was exhausted and had a big mug of coffee. Half asleep and thinking I was in my car, I reached forward to put it in the "cup holder" during the ride. When I let go, I poured hot coffee not only all over myself, but also on the large, angry-looking man next to me. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to put a few extra spoonfuls of sugar in my co-worker's coffee. He thought it would be funny to throw the boiling hot coffee over my crotch. FML
Today, I was running late for work so I grabbed my coffee to go. I was rushing down the stairs when I stumbled a bit and spilled the entire cup of coffee all over myself. I had to go back up, change clothes, and was still late. The kicker? It was decaf. FML
Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML
Today, I was walking into work holding a coffee and a bunch of other things. My employee saw me and held the door. I was almost there when I dropped my coffee, tried to catch it, tripped over the curb and fell flat on my face. I heard the door close while still lying there. FML
Today, my husband woke up, tried walking to the bathroom, fell down, got back up and started peeing on the carpet. I’ve never seen him this drunk before. FML
Today, I rushed to work after spilling coffee on my shirt and thought I’d dried it enough. Under the office lights, it looked like a giant brown stain. Three people asked if I was OK. I spent the whole day hunched over my desk pretending nothing was wrong. FML
Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML
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Top comments
wisericky 12
Dont wear those pants to work. Just dont even wear pants to work, they are overrated.
TylersMB 0
so im guessing you were wearing dark colored pants or jeans? because anything light colored would have showed the color of the coffe. your husband is a nice person btw.
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Comments (81)
salvorican 24
Whoa... that musta been some weird lookin piss..
imacreeper 3
I'm glad your husband has a sense of humor, OP. No sex for a week. Let's see how hard he will laugh now :)
imacreeper 3
He'll be laughing so hard, he'll be in tears ^^
EvilPotato 15
that's is preet funny though.
WCARlover 35
I feel my picture fits this appropriately
larry12693 1
wattta burn
Klums02 0
Actually, what he did WAS hilarious...
foodlord 5
Haha u must hav been really pissed!!! :D
hatepineapple 14
You should see a doctor about your piss being shit-brown.
i_love_grrr 0
maybe she was wearing dark fabric so it looked like a big wet spot? lol
whiteboy7thst 2
Or about your husband being psycho...
omgitstaco 0
guys... coulda been yellow cofee... like dyed yellow?
ipwnlosers 4
When is coffee ever yellow?
boydeee01 7
yeah, wtf are you thinking? yellow coffee...??
AnagenisisZagus 13
Do NOT pass 'Go', do NOT collect $200, as a matter of fact, just do not reproduce. Your very comment just leads me to the conclusion that it should be FORBIDDEAN. Now you go out and have a nice day.....
AnagenisisZagus 13
*forbidden Shit, my mistake.
ThatBoyChinks 0
When I piss in it.
TylersMB 0
so im guessing you were wearing dark colored pants or jeans? because anything light colored would have showed the color of the coffe. your husband is a nice person btw.
imnotonaboat 0
Your comments are just..awful.
capt_awesome1 11
do the same thing to him next time.
wisericky 12
Dont wear those pants to work. Just dont even wear pants to work, they are overrated.
tattortotamus 0
I love both of your pictures!
steveakafranxy 7
ur comment fits ur pic lol
yocxl 0
look at the bright side, at least it doesn't seem to have burned you badly.
Mrdw 2
Your soon to be ex-husband sounds like a dick.
dedrater_kool_u 0
i think ur taking this just a little too far..
DoubleEdgedBlade 4
^ That's what she said!
raider27 7
Maybe he was avoiding an accident? or maybe he was just playing around. Either way, sorry OP
samicna 4
is this the first time he abused you? there are lots of shelters out there to help!