Today, my boyfriend did the washing as an attempt to help me. Not only are all my clothes now pink, he refuses to do the dishes, vacuuming, bathroom, ironing etc., as he has done "plenty." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend set up a very romantic dinner. Afterwards, he offered to wash the dishes while I went upstairs and relaxed. His way of washing the dishes was to scrape all the food off, then wipe the juices off the dishes with a paper towel before putting them back in the cupboards. FML
Today, my boyfriend got upset after I politely asked him to do the laundry. He takes every chance he gets to act macho and brag to people about how he's in the Marines, but apparently he is too much of a pussy to act like a man and clean his own clothes. FML
Today, I came home to find my fiancé trying to do laundry. His version was "rubbing the smelly spots with baby powder". Looks like I'll be the only one doing laundry for the rest of our lives. FML
Today, my wife said I shouldn't wash or iron the clothes, or do the dusting and vacuuming, because, I "don't do it correctly." Also my wife: "You don't do anything to help around here." FML
Today, my boyfriend was tidying up around the room. I asked him if he'd like me to help, to which he responded, "No, I don't need any help," then added, "Wish you weren't so lazy." FML
Today, and ever since my boyfriend moved in, I've learned just how much his mother did everything for him and never taught him how to adult. In the last month I've had to show him how to cook, clean the house, do laundry and drying, use the vacuum, pay household bills, and he still moans its too hard. FML
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, the one who does all the cooking in the house, doesn't wash his hands after using the bathroom. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that I have the bad habit of not doing the dishes before he has his daily piss in the sink. FML
Today, I asked my SO for help with just the laundry, which translated into him only washing his clothes. We're married with multiple kids, and I currently work 2 jobs. FML
Today, after weeks of my girlfriend complaining that I don't help with the chores, I secretly took a day off work to deal with some that were piling up. When she got home, all she could do was complain about how I hadn't done more. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
imaginaryvoice 18
I'm surprised you'd still want him to help after he just turned your wardrobe into Barbies' dream closet.
MikeMikeTheAzn 3
He sounds.... helpful
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (152)
silentbutfunny 0
Make him get a job to pay for a maid. In the end it works.
DocBastard 40
If you have to dry the dishes. And you drop one on the floor. Maybe they won't let you. Dry the dishes anymore. - Shel Silverstein
broken_red_wagon 6
You know it's a well-thought out comment when it's quoting Shel Silverstein.
thiscrazything 1
This was probably the husbands attempt to get out of doing any and all future house work. Better do something to encourage him now ( ex; run away fast; kick him in the ass; hire a man- maid, etc)) or you might have a lot ad house work to do in your future.
mom2pen 4
Actually, the washing machine did the laundry. This guy was too lazy to sort it before turning some knobs. Worthless.
gunhros 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Anyone else think OP is the douche here? He tries to help, and because he messes up - it sounds to me like he was trying to be nice and didn't mean to make your clothes pink - you bitch at him to everyone on the internet? Plus, it sounds like you were perfectly content to having him not do all of those other chores before, but once he tries to help with one thing, he's rewarded with a bitchy girlfriend telling him to do everything else right before posting about how ungrateful she is online. I hope he breaks up with you and finds a nicer girl for himself.
22jrdn55 15
All i read here was, give me a thumbs down please.
DocBastard 40
22jrdn - you misread it. Here's what it actually says: Blah blah misogyny blah blah I'm a douche blah blah kitchen blah blah sammich blah blah I'm a moron. See how much you missed? Glad I could help.
justspin 7
59- I wish I could thumb up your comment more! That was really funny. Made my day so much better!
IdfkMyUsernamexC 5
40 - Not only does your comment deserve a thumbs down, you can't help but bitch yourself and it goes on and on...and on. *Cough*Hypocrite*Cough*
FUUUandyourmom 16
80 - Everything DocBastard says is either hilarious or just amazing. Sometimes I thumbs him up when I read his name before I read the comment because he's always right.
justspin 7
103- I know. Just I was having a shitty day but he made it better. I actually laughed.
Jibblets2367 7
The way I see it, he already ruined your clothes, what more do you want him to mess up?
chosha_fml 27
Ditch his lazy ass. Do you really want to be his housemaid long term? By the way, he is not 'helping you' - that implies it's your job. He is doing his share.
detective_oreo 0
Pink is the new black....
zenrael 21
Those are your jobs in the first place. Blasphemous women these days. . .
chels1994 11
So anymore only wash your clothes and do the dishes you use. You'll be doing plenty (:
omgawshglee 4
.