Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about what we want to be when we grow up. He said he wanted to be a bartender, and single. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for for his birthday in a couple of days. He replied "to be single" and walked out of the room. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he was being for Halloween. He said "Single". FML
Today, my son's teacher asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. He put down "unemployed". FML
Today, my boyfriend told me, with complete confidence, that he's selected "drug dealer" as his career of choice. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided that he didn't need a real job. He wants to sell pot for a living. Or hang drywall. He can't decide. FML
Today, I walked into a liquor store and thought about inquiring for a job application. After seeing the cashier, I thought about inquiring if she was single. After accidentally breaking three bottles of liquor, I didn't do either. I left the store, still single and unemployed. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because of my drunken antics. My reaction? Pour myself a stiff drink. FML
Today, my boyfriend of a year told me he is at the point in his life where he is ready to start a family, get married and have a baby. He also casually stated that he wished he could meet someone he could see himself settling down with. FML
Today, my boyfriend suggested that we become "drug dealers" because I'm a chemistry student and he's seen a few episodes of Breaking Bad. FML
Today, the guy I've been dating said we couldn't see each other anymore because he needed to focus on his career. He's unemployed. FML
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Top comments
Cads1 24
Lucky for you, guys never really grow up.
MDoremis 38
I'd be such an alcoholic if I dated a bartender.
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Comments (51)
ohSNAPyall 27
Believe in his dreams. Help him get halfway there.
radioactiveXcow 14
Sounds like y'all are too young to even be in a relationship. "When we grow up." Smh
danial1214 21
Sounds like they are in high school... I don't know about you but most people have relationships in high school at least once.
skullmaster9 10
Well I want to be a bartender too, but I don't care about being single or not
gratunka 11
sounds like he wants to be a practice boyfriend. time to move on if you are looking for someone more serious.
Nightbird827 15
I live in TN so you don't got to be single..lol
trucker2 33
Sounds more like a Dry sense of humor. Did you tell him you want to be the alcoholic on the pole, at his dream job?
donuts678 25
What shitty aspirations
WhatsYOURname6 25
What age are you guys if you're still calling it 'grow up'?
Cads1 24
35 year old male.
GoldenGirl879 4
Its time to fulfil his dream of being single...
Xion0014 20
How old are you? 12?