Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML
Today, I was feeling a bit randy, so when my boyfriend got home, I jumped on him and gave him a proper deep-tongue kiss. I noticed he tasted a bit weird, so I asked him when he last brushed his teeth. His answer: the day we had dinner with his mother. That was two weeks ago. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he stopped brushing his teeth two days after we started dating. Tomorrow is our 2 year anniversary. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend complained that I "treat him like a child" by asking him if he’s brushed his teeth before we kiss. Gee maybe if he brushed regularly like a fucking adult, I wouldn’t HAVE to ask. FML
Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML
Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML
Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML
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Top comments
Mischief109 11
What I'm wondering is why did you make out without brushing your teeth first?!
EvilTwerp 12
Maybe you should brush your teeth. Not everyone likes to be disgusting.
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Comments (91)
Californian_Boy 6
Something I would say ad well. I've said it before to an EX
MissMae93 23
If he can FEEL that you need to brush, imagine how bad your breath must smell and how gross you must taste. Seriously, twice a day isn't that hard.
BunBunBabe 8
Gross, if he really thought that why would he run his tongue against them all like he wanted to lick them clean
thatonename 7
Because he wanted to lick them clean, obviously.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Ew :/ I'm sorry but YDI! No one likes kissing someone who hasn't brushed their teeth unless they're disgusting as well!
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
He kind of just ate whatever was between your teeth...
ghnatliker 0
Grosss, lol
Pandacupcakelove 26
O.e Brush your teeth, hun....
mckaylanicole59 4
ha. probably wasnt in the modd for hat ever youve eaten.
MissMae93 23
Uh... What did you just say?
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
I think they said he probably wasn't in the mood for whatever you have eaten.
retyi43 14
this FML made me go brush my teeth.
yumcupcakes 2
I don't know what's more disgusting.. You not brushing your teeth or the fact that he LICKED your teeth.