Today, my boss sat me down to discuss the sounds my co-workers have heard coming from my cubicle. Apparently my music sounds like the background tracks from shitty soft-core porn movies. I'm getting a three day suspension while they go through all my files. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I discovered that my boss listens to the things we say about him on the audio-enabled cameras at our work. I'm thus currently jobless. FML
Today, I finally found a job as a secretary for a small film studio. The sets are in a soundproofed part of the building, but not for the typical reasons. Right through the wall is a pornography studio. It's all I'll hear from 8 to 5 every day. FML
Today, I was written up and banned from playing my songs at the office. Turns out that my other workmates snitched on me because I was playing '90s rock and pop, which was stressing them out somehow. Of course, the burnout I had from listening to three straight hours of tacky Reggaeton music didn't matter. FML
Today, at work, I received an email telling me that viewing porn websites was prohibited and was a good enough reason to fire me. FML
Today, my boss put me on suspension for violating company policy by having non-work related mail in my inbox. They were spam emails. FML
Today, the guy in the cubicle across from me complained about me to our boss. Apparently, his relatives heard me typing something on his daily 8+ hour call to them, and now don't believe he has his own office. My boss took his side and asked me to type quieter. FML
Today, at work my boss called me into his office because he had received multiple complaints from coworkers about a prank sound machine I have been using to make inappropriate fart sounds at my desk. I wish it was a fart machine; I have a condition. FML
Today, my boss suspended me for laughing too hard at my desk and causing a big scene in front of our customers. I was laughing because he'd forwarded me a hilarious email. He was practically smirking as he handed me my official warning. FML
Today, I was studying my anatomy book for nursing school while in the break room at my day job. My nosy-ass, ignorant coworker who always finds a way to butt into everyone’s business told the front office I was looking at porn. I got written up for, "displaying offensive materials." FML
Today, I lost my earbuds on the subway to work, so I had to listen to my boss's terrible music all day. FML
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Top comments
shutup_matt 5
What kind of crappy music do you listen to?
deafeningsilence 8
Well, if they can't find anything, then you're in the clear.
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Comments (161)
Igor_g5 0
You Deserve It for listening to music that sounds like crappy ****.
iheartgway11 0
Well atleast now you get three days off work xD
cimh 9
unpaid days is not that much fun though!
kissmeee 5
Lol so u deffinetly were watching **** y else would u be worried? ahah(:
devans00 14
Dear Original Poster What makes you think your co-workers want to listen to your music? Buy some headphones. The "**** music" harassment is payback for forcing them to be bothered by your noise. Signed Possible Office Neighbor
BrimfullOfAsher 20
Buy headphones, use them, and remember this test: if you can hear music from the headphones when they're not on your head, then the music is too loud.
koverton91 0
You need to listen to music and not **** soundtracks... There's a difference.
IamFukD 2
tell me the song u here.
ronno 3
imagine wat ur co-workers must hv thot
aPieceOfFruit 16
Image there surprise when they don't find soft core **** on your computer. pft! I bet what they find on your computer is anything but softcore :D
jmrgirl3 6
Ok... You guys literally have NO LIVES!!! if u sitting here hating on JB just because he might have a higher voice... No one hates on other guys who sing high... And there grown men... So shut the **** up and get on with ur life... Just cause he can get girls and hes cute... **** the haters!!!!