Today, my 3-year-old girl accidentally caught sight of me stepping out of the shower. Now she thinks "daddy has a tail" and she just has to let everyone know about it. FML
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Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML
Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML
Today, my 3-year-old came to me very excited because he had gone to the bathroom by himself for the first time. What he did not tell me was that he had shit on the floor, and when I went into the bathroom to check, I slipped on a turd and knocked myself out on the sink. FML
Today, as I got out of the shower, my young stepson saw me naked. Later, he asked his mom why my "pee pee" is so small when everyone says it is supposed to get bigger when you become an adult. FML
Today, my toddler started chirping, "Mommy’s on the toilet!" while I was in a public restroom at our local mall. She also knocked on the stall door to make sure everyone was made aware of our exact location. FML
Today, I figured out my 1-year-old daughter likes to dip her hand in our dogs' water bowl, and rub the water on her face. So I put the water bowl out of reach. She then figured out how to open the bathroom door and use the toilet instead. FML
Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML
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Top comments
potatocouch 16
Hey, at least your child thinks it's long enough to be considered a "tail".
NoThanks999 19
Tell her only mommy can see the tail ;)
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Comments (49)
superlloyd 15
she should know what the human form looks like.
Weasel14 8
I suppose that's better than her catching sight of you on purpose
daidax_238 26
This sounds suspiciously similar to an FML I saw a while back...
DoomedGemini 38
I feel like this isn't a rare thing. A young child in the home where a male goes to the bathroom, changes, and showers? It probably happens to a lot of fathers.
Dictionaryspeaks 18
Ahhhh... One of childhoods many scars
hilamonster06 21
I have to admit that that is just adorable.
orangejubejube 20
I don't get why it's so weird for kids to see their parents naked.. My niece is 4 and she sometimes showers with me, it's just faster/easier. My boyfriend, her, and I hang out in our underwear and sleep in the nude, and she often hangs around to give her opinion on outfits when we're getting dressed. Nudity is just a casual thing in the house, ever since she was a baby, everyone feels at home and is comfortable with it. As long as she respects privacy and understands that everyone needs a different level of it -knocking on closed doors, turning/leaving the room when one doesn't want to be seen unclothed, realizing that guests or people in public may not want have the same comfort levels as us, etc. - I don't see a problem. Comfort with one's own body should be encouraged rather than shamed.
amsterdamgirl 20
agreed!
mattyiscool123 26
Americans are self-conscious. That's all I can say. It's pretty sad
AshBash2211 14
Sounds like a perfect opportunity to teach her that boys and girls are different... Kids should be educated about human anatomy from a young age!
jar_of_dirt 4
this happened to me when i was three but i thought it was a big poop and my mom just covered my eyes and carried me out of the room..... my dad is white by the way it was just pretty dark in the room
prc_ 5
YDI. In my country we have this thing called sauna (google it if does not say anything to you). Anyhow whole family usually goes there together until kids reach something like 5-8 years. And the split to males / females happens. Thus they see differences between male and female analogy very young. Aaand thus here the kids dont yell about tails and stuff because they feel and know its normal that we have small differences.
clair_brodie 35
Did my dad just time travel to post this? Pretty sure I said this exact same thing. Minus the telling people about it.