Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went clothes shopping. I took my little daughter into the dressing room while I tried some clothes on. She somehow managed to open the door while I was changing. A lady outside then bitched me out for "exposing" myself to her kids. FML
Today, I was in a department store with my three year old daughter to buy some new jeans. I took her into the dressing room with me and as I began to take off my pants she yells, "Mommy, you can't go peepee in here!!" I am no longer welcome in that particular store. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML
Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML
Today, we went out to dinner to a family restaurant, and I was wearing a skirt since it's so warm out. My 4 year old scooted under the table to sit next to his brother. When he popped up on the other side, he exclaimed, "Mommy! You forgot to put on your underwears!" People were staring. FML
Today, my toddler started chirping, "Mommy’s on the toilet!" while I was in a public restroom at our local mall. She also knocked on the stall door to make sure everyone was made aware of our exact location. FML
Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML
Today, my mom and I went to the mall to look for some boxer briefs. While looking, I saw two girls I knew from school, so I went over to say hello. At least, that was my plan, but my mom screamed, "Look! These have dinosaurs on them!" They left the store giggling. FML
Today, I, a forty year-old man, went to the store with my teenage daughter and infant son. I got some very dirty looks. FML
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Top comments
1dvs_bstd 41
Your kid is diabolically hardcore.
GrinchFu1 27
This is why I love little kids. They truly live in their own tiny little worlds... ******* adorable. You're a star, mom!
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Comments (77)
1dvs_bstd 41
Your kid is diabolically hardcore.
trollcrusher 17
Maybe she was just proud of her mother and wanted to show her off? Okay, no, I can't sincerely make light of this. OP, it sounds like your daughter could use some stern words and perhaps some form of repercussion, depending on how deliberate she was in causing embarrassment for you.
alisha0215 12
#19 she's 4. not saying it is ok but kids do that kind of stuff that's why you have to keep a close eye on them.
rileyrae0000 23
Yeah I don't think a 4 year old was purposely causing harm
MasterTron 24
A kindergarten class conspired to kill their teacher
lunaangel 14
ok #46 I am now disturbed
GEFStryker 29
#46, I think you singlehandedly started a new Google search trend. On the other hand, you are wrong. 8 and 9 year olds kindergarteners do not make.
trollcrusher 17
@25 & 29 I've been around a lot of children that age, either from relatives or in a preschool environment (my sister is a teacher). I'm a little worried that you're so quick to dismiss that sort of behavior just because they're four years old. If you, as a parent, do not take on the responsibility of teaching your child right from wrong, as well as proper public behavior, your expectations are far too low. The appropriate thing to do as a parent is to firmly correct the behavior, in a way that you see fit, without being harsh.
alisha0215 12
yes. and as a parent, 4 year olds are going to do stuff like that...they are suppose to because they are still learning right from wrong.i never said she shouldn't be corrected for doing that because it could happen agian or she could do it to someone else....but it doesnt make it any less funny.
ihavenolifehaha 16
They probably enjoyed the show
voncrane 23
That's hilarious, I would have laughed it off.. Feel sorry for you though OP.
joeyl2008 29
I'm not sure why you're getting disliked. That is hilarious
catlover5299 18
#55 It has 2 plus likes...
Googolman 29
Did they applaud?
Kurby14 21
just remember this when she's a teenager and it will be your turn to embaress her. moms know how to really do it!
Mauskau 36
When I was a kid, I went to see one of those Santa people. Instead of saying what I wanted for Christmas, I pulled his beard off and shouted "HO HO HO!". My mum tried to embarrass me with it a few years ago, all I could think was how awesome I was and laughed at little me. Chances are, trying to embarrass OP's kid with this will not work. I for one would find it hilarious.
randomcritic 14
How did Santa react? That sounds hilarious.
Kurby14 21
thanks that's actually what i meant when I wrote it.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
Trust me, when her daughter turns 13-14, she will most likely look back at this and be embarrassed. Maybe when she's older than 13-14, she'll laugh it off, but she'll most likely be embarrassed by that age.
MrThump 16
Some people would pay money to see that. Nice work kid!
igg125 30
She will be a good party host in the future.
Cads1 24
Will there be an encore performance some time soon.
Jowisee 29
Taadaaa!
pdp_fml 21
Did she learn to say that from her dad?