Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my 18 year-old son learned that just because his girlfriend was on top doesn't mean gravity will prevent her from becoming pregnant. FML
Today, I went with my son to a conference about sexual education at his high school. I guess it was all too late, because among the attendees I saw three girls from the same high school who were already pregnant. They aren't even 18. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I also found out I have an STD. I was clean before we dated. FML
Today, my girlfriend told her parents that she's pregnant. We have never even come close to having sex, but she told them I'm the father. Not only is my girlfriend cheating on me, but her father now wants me dead. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me by testing myself for STIs/STDs and got a positive result for chlamydia. FML
Today, my youngest, the 17 year-old, told me she’s pregnant. That makes it official: despite all my warnings about safe sex, all three of my daughters got pregnant before the age of 18. FML
Today, I took my transfer student, who I am hosting for her year of study in America, to the doctor. It turns out that she is pregnant, and my teenage son is the father. FML
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
Today, I told to my son that I'm pregnant. After I'd told him, he looked up and yelled, "Fuck this shit!" and walked out of the room. My son is nine years-old. FML
Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML
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Top comments
lilhellian 27
And he thought he was the father how?
B00M3R_S00N3R 11
Why do parents expect the school to do everything for them? It's not their job to teach your child about sex so YDI
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Comments (177)
Saraishi 25
This FML reminded me of Carl from Shameless.
peithecelt 28
The school did not fail to educate him, his parents did. Oh wait.... YDI.
lucasj23 11
oh come on. he's 19 and doesn't know how babies are made? I'm finding that hard to believe.
thebatman310 3
I personally don't feel its the schools responsibility to have the talk with kids. you shoukd have already had that coversation a long time ago. even if they do have a sex ed class you should have went over it also to ensure everything you feel they needed to know was covered.
shannon2348 14
Oh come on. How could he possibly not know about sex at his age? Did he go to school? Have friends? Go on the internet?
randybryant799 21
I really have no idea how your son could be 19 and not know how babies are made. Has he never seen a movie or read a book? Has he been living under a rock??