Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Whaaaaat?
Today, my 18 year-old son learned that just because his girlfriend was on top doesn't mean gravity will prevent her from becoming pregnant. FML
Sex ed is broken
Today, I went with my son to a conference about sexual education at his high school. I guess it was all too late, because among the attendees I saw three girls from the same high school who were already pregnant. They aren't even 18. FML
Because of him
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I also found out I have an STD. I was clean before we dated. FML
Paternity test
Today, my girlfriend told her parents that she's pregnant. We have never even come close to having sex, but she told them I'm the father. Not only is my girlfriend cheating on me, but her father now wants me dead. FML
Wrap it up
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me by testing myself for STIs/STDs and got a positive result for chlamydia. FML
Bad grandparenting
Today, my youngest, the 17 year-old, told me she’s pregnant. That makes it official: despite all my warnings about safe sex, all three of my daughters got pregnant before the age of 18. FML
Today, I took my transfer student, who I am hosting for her year of study in America, to the doctor. It turns out that she is pregnant, and my teenage son is the father. FML
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
Good news
Today, I told to my son that I'm pregnant. After I'd told him, he looked up and yelled, "Fuck this shit!" and walked out of the room. My son is nine years-old. FML
Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML
Top comments
lilhellian 27
And he thought he was the father how?
B00M3R_S00N3R 11
Why do parents expect the school to do everything for them? It's not their job to teach your child about sex so YDI
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Comments (177)
mcomedyman94 15
You deserve it for not being a responsible parent and giving him the sex talk yourself. I really hate parents nowadays that think the school should take care of that. Your son was 19 and had no clue what sex even was. You failed incredibly as a parent.
ajs1987 15
You're his parent, YOU should've given him the sex talk, and you should've done it several years ago.
thatcoolguy123 14
The sex talk is for either 6th or 8th grade, the beginning and ending years of middle school. We started learning the reproductive system in 6th grade, so you should've told him about sex at this time. He's now a college student and had no idea what sex really was for his whole life. You failed amazingly as a parent for relying on his middle school to teach them this crap.
thatcoolguy123 14
Forget my second sentence. I meant to say that people usually start learning about this in middle school anyway.
Simbaby 23
YDI. You should have given him the talk a lot sooner than that.
bradyduncan 10
STD-SEXUALLY transmitted disease
roadrunner1278 3
why are you relying on the school to give him the talk??
Repethetic 25
as a dad I'm pretty sure you're the person who should be giving the sex talk.
bassfisher100 23
thats terrible
Bgreen94 12
wow she sounds like a keeper!
cats54321 19
You deserve it