Today, my 18 year-old daughter comes home, telling me she has been fired from her job at McDonalds. The reason? They had iCarly Happy Meal toys and she couldn't resist stealing one. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to McDonald's and ordered a Happy Meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML
Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML
Today, I was fired from my job at a local family-ran restaurant. The Reason? The owner's daughter has been stealing money from the register little by little and has blamed me for all the lost money. The boss is still convinced it's me, though, because his daughter would "never tell a lie". FML
Today, while working at McDonald's, I was pulled into the manager's office and informed that I'd been caught stealing money from the safe. When I told them to show me the security footage, they refused and fired me on the spot. FML
Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML
Today, when I was finished eating at McDonald's, I went to Shoppers to pick up a new toothbrush. I got back to my car only to find the windows smashed in. The only thing that was missing from my car was the Hello Kitty toy I got from McDonald's. Someone broke into my car for a 10 cent toy. FML
Today, I was at McDonald's and I was going through the drive-thru. As I was driving away, I checked my food and the lady had given me a Night at the Museum Happy Meal toy by mistake. I got so excited that I crashed the car into a pole. I'm 36. FML
Today, I took away my 8-year-old daughter's toy for throwing it too many times. She then said, "I need a beer." FML
Today, my son was fired from his new job, which was going to support us since I recently lost mine. His excuse was, "Conflict of interest." He was a mascot for a fast-food restaurant and refused to dance around. FML
Today, I got a call informing me that my 16-year-old daughter had been arrested for shoplifting jewellery. Trying to look on the bright side, I assumed it was for my birthday that is coming up in a few days. Nope. It was a "Thank you" gift. For her drug dealer. FML
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Top comments
mordantennui 0
that sounds like the lamest ways to get fired
Bob31_fml 4
your daughter sounds like a high class individual.
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Comments (137)
MRsJenni 0
that is pathetic...I'm embarrassed for her! she has a mind of a 4 year old!
Sheslikeheroin 0
Lmao. Am I the only one who lol at my daughter for doing this. She got fired from Mickey D's. Big deal.
rylove01 0
Well if this is true, a: she sucks at being sneaky, b: she has hard ass manager, and c: I'm sure she could of just found one left behind on the table or floor if she was patient enough. I work at a different fast food restaraunt and i know someone who takes kid toys for their child, its not that hard, but then again our managers could prolly care less they are pretty much push overs
fuzz97 23
ur daughter's a retard
Namenlos_fml 20
Wow... your daughter is a moron. She probably could have gotten it for like $3.99 or something... free even, if the manager is a cool guy/gal... now she has to live the rest of her professional life having to explain why she got fired from McDonalds at every job interview she'll ever go to....
danielhartlesss 13
haha too bad my friend that works at mcdonalds told me that those toys only cost like $1.80
jal10a 1
i work there they're $1.08
Erindub 0
You did a terriffic job raising her. You should be proud!
nolimits 0
YDI for raising a daughter who's too stupid to successfully steal a small plastic toy.
Quest_ 13
Wow, seriously? I can't believe how tight-waddish McDonalds is. They are an absolutely frightening, money-making machine, but they would fire an employee over a toy it cost them fifty cents to make? The whole thing reeks of Nazism.
nolimits 0
Way to equate genocide with firing an employee for theft.
Quest_ 13
Way to shut up.
stunlock_ftl 0
The Star Wars toys are much cooler. I'd have stolen those. I drooled over the boxes in the back room until we could finally open them. Then I bought one of each. [: