Today, I was on a first date with a really nice guy and, of course, when there was an awkward silence, I started talking and realized too late that I was running through my usual complaints about my worthless baby daddies. He asked how many and I said three, and he left without a word. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my date asked how many kids and baby daddies I had. When I responded neither because I'm not like that, he didn't believe me and left. FML
Today, I agreed to go on a date with this really nice guy. Halfway through the date, he started talking about his wife and kids. FML
Today, I was supposed to be going on my first date with a guy I really liked. He never showed up. I just found out my dad was outside washing the car when my date showed up. He told him he didn't have a daughter and to never show up on his driveway again. FML
Today, I went on my first date with a guy I really like. He completely ignored me. FML
Today, a first date with a guy went so badly that he actually paid me to never call him again. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for ages. Midway through the meal, he sighed and said, "I'll be honest, this is a horrible date. You got zero personality and I'm too lazy to do a window escape, so..." He then got up and walked out. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML
Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML
Today, I was eating lunch on my first date with a really pretty girl, when my ex shows up at the same restaurant and starts telling her how bad of a boyfriend I was. My date left. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy. I lost interest in him quick, so I excused myself to go to the bathroom, hoping to make a run for the hills. As soon as I reached the front door, our server yells out, "I hope you’re not thinking about dining and dashing!" FML
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Top comments
Shzusuziq11 12
three worthless baby daddies? maybe the problem isn't them, maybe it's you!
stickyface 17
Nice, responsible guys aren't interested in being #4. At least you fessed up at the jump, even if you didn't mean to.
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Comments (3)
stickyface 17
Nice, responsible guys aren't interested in being #4. At least you fessed up at the jump, even if you didn't mean to.
Shzusuziq11 12
three worthless baby daddies? maybe the problem isn't them, maybe it's you!
NostalgiaFreak9 43
When you have one worthless baby daddy, that baby daddy is [usually] the [only] problem. When you have three worthless baby daddies, YOU'RE the problem.