Today, my 18 year-old daughter comes home, telling me she has been fired from her job at McDonalds. The reason? They had iCarly Happy Meal toys and she couldn't resist stealing one. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to McDonald's and ordered a Happy Meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML
Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML
Today, I was fired from my job at a local family-ran restaurant. The Reason? The owner's daughter has been stealing money from the register little by little and has blamed me for all the lost money. The boss is still convinced it's me, though, because his daughter would "never tell a lie". FML
Today, while working at McDonald's, I was pulled into the manager's office and informed that I'd been caught stealing money from the safe. When I told them to show me the security footage, they refused and fired me on the spot. FML
Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML
Today, when I was finished eating at McDonald's, I went to Shoppers to pick up a new toothbrush. I got back to my car only to find the windows smashed in. The only thing that was missing from my car was the Hello Kitty toy I got from McDonald's. Someone broke into my car for a 10 cent toy. FML
Today, I was at McDonald's and I was going through the drive-thru. As I was driving away, I checked my food and the lady had given me a Night at the Museum Happy Meal toy by mistake. I got so excited that I crashed the car into a pole. I'm 36. FML
Today, I took away my 8-year-old daughter's toy for throwing it too many times. She then said, "I need a beer." FML
Today, my son was fired from his new job, which was going to support us since I recently lost mine. His excuse was, "Conflict of interest." He was a mascot for a fast-food restaurant and refused to dance around. FML
Today, I got a call informing me that my 16-year-old daughter had been arrested for shoplifting jewellery. Trying to look on the bright side, I assumed it was for my birthday that is coming up in a few days. Nope. It was a "Thank you" gift. For her drug dealer. FML
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Top comments
mordantennui 0
that sounds like the lamest ways to get fired
Bob31_fml 4
your daughter sounds like a high class individual.
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Comments (137)
vonnsta09 0
i don't see how this is an fml, its more of a mlia.
choiboy118 0
really? how is tht an fml?? is ur daughter lk supporting ur entire welfare or something?
jalopotan 8
How is this an FML?OH wait i get it cause its so emberrising for your daughter to like something PUH-leaze ppl do this shit all dah time -.-'
jalopotan 8
oh oh and that it sucks soooo bad that you cant get a job and shes probably going to college anyways get your lazy ass off the couch
jalopotan 8
But still when my sister worked at mcdonalds she would always bring me and my bro a extra toy or chicken nuggets =3 the boss even let her!Cause were cool like dat xD
lovelove24 1
ewwwww icarly sux dick. plz I bet icarly has a dick
fakeaccountX 6
best comment ever
Knod 0
Your daughter fails
xNephilim 19
Your daughter is an idiot. I mean, those toys cost like....20 cents?
gb_chrs 2
really? a 99cents toy? why couldn't she have bought it?
123ilovejustinb 12
Hahaha I got the gumball machine. I'm 14