Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Specially for dad
Today, my daughter ran up to me and gave me a cup. She said it was lemonade that she made with her friend. When I took a sip, she giggled and ran back to her room. It was not lemonade. FML
Life goals
Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML
Today, my 12-year-old daughter informed me that she is eager to lose her virginity, "Because I don't want to be thrown into a volcano!" FML
Today, my daughter asked me to take her to Victoria's Secret so I could buy her some "sexy clothes". She's 9. FML
Irony failure
Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML
Uptight girl, she's been living in her uptight world…
Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML
Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not a virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", Honey. FML
Top comments
Sir_ND_Pity 35
1 - Yes, yes she did :)
iLike2Teabag 27
Don't pretend like any other generation didn't do their share of questionable things.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (361)
aaaaaay 8
wow she's so young, I'm 16 and I've barely even kissed a guy!
TJRou09 10
ouch
mcrfan45 10
Well..... um... I can't decide whether your daughter is a hoe bag or if you failed as a parent. :/ I guess it's kind of both?
crystalxa 35
oh. no.
kyla_milan13 5
I'm just confused about how the most honest&truthful comments get thumbs down and funny ones praising that she lost it already get thumbs up. That's just a shame and terribly disgusting.
Gamecast20 5
Please shoot me this world is going downhill as we speak sooner or later youlll have 8 year olds loosing there virginty jk but still please shoot me
PizzaDeliveryGrl 19
Oh Jesus, I'M 13. We really don't need to be doing this, I think a lot of people aren't getting that.
meowwwwwws 8
Well that escalated quickly..
Amadog19 10
Lets all just hope that to the OP's daughter thought that masturbation counts as taking her virginity away..
Sabsnation 12
if she doesn't know what a virgin beverage is, she isn't old enough for the D.