Ann
United States
Today, my 12 year old cousin decided that "all men are pigs" and deleted every male contact in my phone. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
DCarreon
Ceres, United States
Today, my seemingly normal girlfriend decided to erase every girl's name out of my phone. Family and all. FML
Not funny!
United States
Cruel winter
Today, my uncle stole my cousin's phone to take a picture of me. He then sent said picture to my cousin's boyfriend, saying that she'd been cheating on him with me for over a year. He's been cheated on before and is hysterical. My uncle then had the nerve to act all defensive when my cousin and I exploded at him. FML
jake
Denver, United States
Jealousy
Today, my girlfriend demanded that I delete all my female contacts or she’d set my stuff on fire. Yes, that includes my mother. FML
jakeson12
Dundee, United Kingdom
Today, my "friend" thought it'd be absolutely hilarious to use my phone to text my girlfriend, bragging that I'd found a new "slampiece" and that she's "fukcin dumpd". Now I'm single, her dad keeps making threatening calls to me, and nobody will even listen to my side of the story. FML
amber
United States
Today, I bitched out my boyfriend for logging into my facebook account and deleting EVERY male (even family) off my friends list. He accused me of wanting to cheat on him and has forced me to say "sorry." FML
Anonymous
They hated her because she spoke the truth
Today, I threw a pillow at my 8 year-old cousin while play-fighting. She gave me a look, then muttered, "You don't have any girlfriends and the girls that talk to you probably have no taste." FML
alissa_roar
United States
Today, my boyfriend of two years told me I was being too obsessive. This is the guy who has gone through my phone two separate times and deleted all of my male contacts. FML
brittbrat4
United States
Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML
Anonymous
Bangor, United Kingdom
No introductions needed
Today, my younger half-sister discovered my existence. She then went to our grandparents' house, smashed my picture off their wall, and ransacked their house looking for other pictures of me to destroy. She's in her mid-twenties, behaving like a child. FML
Anonymous
Don't you know that you're toxic?
Today, I found out my girlfriend talks to around 18 other men for fun. She says she loves me more, but I told her to prove it, so I took her phone and deleted the social media accounts that she made just for these men. Now I'm a "toxic controlling monster" because I don't let her chat with random men. FML
Top comments
faithe92 0
start em off early
Keyman1212 14
I don't look like a pig
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Comments (197)
meintx 9
Awww, sounds like your lil precious cousin got dumped. OR she's jealous of the time you're spending with guys, you ****. LOL But regardless she still deserves a beat down for jacking with your stuff. So it's up to you to teach her.
0opsie 6
Even at age 12 she should know better. She had no right to mess with your phone, no matter how bad her stupid middle school break-up was. And it's sad to see how many people here are condoning her sexist attitude. Delete all female contacts from her phone. When she yells at you about it, tell her that you were just following her logic: She was being a bitch, therefore all women are bitches.
Oceanborn_fml 24
Unlock patterns/PINs ftw!
BobbieH 19
why are you letting a 12 yr old play with your phone? or anyone for that matter? that's what you get!
khaya 9
Now all the pigs are either dead or lost.
danz123 7
You started her off early there with the male hate, didn't ya.
AcidRaen 4
sounds like a feminist lesbian in the making
AcidRaen 4
wtf? thanks for making my comment blocked... it didnt have anything bad in it. it was a ******* joke. and theres been worse on here...
AcidRaen 4
this comment was not homophobic. i am NOT homophobic. im bisexual for pete's sake. it was a joke. not meant to be homophobic... jeeze
Sirin_fml 47
I don't see what being bisexual has to do with an offensive joke about lesbians and feminists. So, it was a joke but not one in the tone or the taste of the site. We live, we learn, and then we move on. :-)
AcidRaen 4
they said it was homophobic....it was not...and im not in any way homophobic... thats what i meant. and i included the fact that i am bisexual to make a point.
Sirin_fml 47
I think the term was used as to mean it's offensive to many lesbians because of the stereotyping. But again, that's besides the point; let's not have ill-feeling, let's just learn something, laugh, and move on. There's no shame in a commenting faux-pas.
AcidRaen 4
okay...sorry... i dont think anyone gets sarcasm nowadays
bkaneshiro14 0
umm... re add?
jlperry31 10
kids suck
AScic1 3
At 12 years old im sure she actually knows enough mature males to make that conclusion. Sarcasm in its finest. I wonder how mommys marriage is doing?