Today, my 1-year-old son walked up to me with a disgusted look on his face. I could tell he had something in his mouth so I pulled it out. He'd been sucking on a piece of cat poop. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Nice day for it
Today, my 5 year old-son and I went out for a walk. As I was looking in a shop's window display, I turned around to see my son pooping into an open manhole on the street. FML
Today, I asked my one-year-old to come and give mommy a kiss. She did and it was really sweet, until she tried to spit a piece of dog food into my mouth. FML
Today, I heard my dog chewing on something. I called her over, held out my hand, and told her to drop it. She dropped it into my hand, and I was proud of her. That was until I realized it was cat poop. FML
Best gift ever
Today, my toddler gave me what I thought was a ball of melted chocolate. I held it and sniffed it to be sure… It was a freaking ball of her poop. FML
Shitty situation
Today, I went to change my one year-old son's diaper and it was a total disaster! He'd picked at his diaper and it came loose. There was poop all over his sleeper, and when I went to clean it up, he put his hands in it. Let's just say I threw the damn sleeper away. FML
Natural selection
Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML
Best gift ever
Today, my toddler handed me a present and told me to keep it forever. It was a piece of dog poo. FML
Today, I was holding my son and smelled poop so I checked his diaper, but there was nothing there. Then I realized it was my breath. FML
Today, my son pooped in his diaper and managed to somehow take it off without my knowledge. He then sat down on the carpet and imitated a dog with worms, all the way down the hallway, through the living room, and into my bedroom. FML
Food for thought
Today, while assisting my 2 year-old with potty training, she stuck her hand in her own poop, and when I wasn't expecting it, put her fingers in my mouth. Ever wondered what a green blowout tastes like? I don't have to. FML
Top comments
Tripartita 45
Knowing whether or not you actually have a cat could make this FML so much more interesting.
Glowworm56 27
Well that would explain why he was so disgusted!
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Comments (13)
mackdeezy 22
Had he eaten it, that cat poop would have converted into himan poop. But thank god you took it out. Gross.
Glowworm56 27
Well that would explain why he was so disgusted!
Tripartita 45
Knowing whether or not you actually have a cat could make this FML so much more interesting.
Akitakat 31
What a CAT-astrophe!
Lobby_Bee 18
I suppose it's hard for a baby to distinguish cat poop and malteaser, hell I just finally got it after all these years of mistake.
RichardPencil 32
On the plus side, he’ll never raid your stash of Tootsie Rolls.
EnvyMe33 26
How did you let your 1 year old out of sight long enough to play in the litter box and stick a cat turd in his mouth?!?
Madrias 36
Only takes 30 seconds for something like that to happen. If you're busy trying to make a meal, or take a shit, or get the laundry done, there's more than enough time for a kid to wander off, dig in the cat box, and find something gross. Especially if you've set up a play area and aren't used to the old standard of "When they're noisy, it's perfectly normal. Worry when they go quiet."
Jax Sproule 4
Watch for a fever - he may get toxoplasmosis from that.
Cierra Amond 14
The best part will be if you don't even have a cat!
soupram 6
I made the mistake of reading FMLs while eating my breakfast