Today, I was working and eating. I was so tired that I bit into my pen and smeared my chocolate-filled pastry on my exercise book. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I smashed a spider with my pencil eraser. Later, I absentmindedly chewed on it while doing my homework. FML
Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML
Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML
Today, I was sitting at the computer when this really annoying fly kept landing on the keyboard. After a while, I took the bottom of a pen and squished it. Twenty minutes later I absentmindedly started chewing at the bottom of the pen. FML
Today, I was in an exam and was chewing the end of my pen, stuck on a question. My mouth filled up with ink. I wasn't allowed to leave, so I had to sit for another hour with a foul-tasting blue tongue and a half-working pen. FML
Today, I was being playful with my boyfriend and put a chocolate between my legs. He bit the chocolate. My lips too... FML
Today, my boss ate a small piece of paper off her desk, thinking it was frosting. I have to work for this woman. FML
Today, in an attempt to eat healthier snacks, I took an apple to work. I ate it after lunch. Now my teeth are full of bits of apple and I can't focus on my work because it's distracting. Three hours until I can get home and floss. FML
Today, I found ants all over my chocolate, but I'm so addicted that I just wiped them off and ate it anyway. FML
Today, I was running late for work and skipped breakfast. At a red light, I noticed a granola bar in my bag and so I took a bite, only to realize it was actually a dog treat I'd stuffed in there days ago. FML
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Top comments
fackit 0
exercise and chocolate pastries do not go well together
whitey_fml 0
and how does one "crunch a pen", exactly?
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Comments (23)
fackit 0
exercise and chocolate pastries do not go well together
nyknicks167 1
what the hell does this mean? u crunched ur pen? and crushed ur pastry on ur exercise book? u dont know how to eat and work at the same time or something?
geronimo_fml 0
what?
whitey_fml 0
and how does one "crunch a pen", exactly?
LinneaHall 0
Just think of it as a blessing in disguise, I'll bet you feel better having not eaten it?
hulabird 0
how could you feel good about not eating something as great as a chocolate croissiant? id rather be happy than save myself from carbs.
libbypotpie 0
kudos to you for being a normal human being, and eating a chocolate pastry. I only came on the comments to see if anyone made a fit about you eating normal people food, and working out at the same time. #5, why should she "feel better for not eating it"? its kind of sad how its a "bad thing" to eat something like a chocolate pastry (and if shes working out, it means she has what appears to be healthy habits!) because it has GASP calories. Geez. I would rather eat and be happy, instead of being empty and disgustingly skinny, or even "hott skinny" and eat only cardboard, health food 24/7, and miss out. We have such an unrealistic opinion of food these days..
whyme_ss 0
#6 is right besides she said working it didnt have to be excersize like im trying to lose weight, it could've been like... some project for his/her job
evilchickenb 0
#6 i agree 100%
popoman 0
Dumbass, you totally deserved it. If you were so tired, you couldn't tell the difference between a pen and food that's not even shaped like a pen, then you shouldn't be working.
shadexilmaendu 4
Hah, because most people can just decide not to go into work whenever they want. I've had shitty jobs that don't even give you suck leave.
ny1996 0
FAKE- you would write with the one you would be holding your pen, because you can only write with that hand. and you would eat with the other one
xXSmexiRainbowXx 0
They could be ambidextrous, you never know.
Xaujin 0
psh everyone has just enough "fat" in them to eat with both hands damnit!
UWBeautyQueen12 0
excercize and pastries sure do make you slim!