Today, it hit me that I'm incredibly pathetic, when at the age of 21, I tucked my stuffed animals into bed with me, facing in different directions so they could keep watch for monsters while I slept. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night and panicked because I couldn't find my blankie. I'll be 36 in a month. FML
Today, a tarantula joined my stuffed animal collection in its drawer. It, unfortunately, wasn't stuffed. FML
Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML
Today, I had to tell my doctor the real reason why I can't sleep at night for him to prescribe me anymore Ambien: I still have the irrational fear that there are monsters in the closet. I'm 22. FML
Today, my dog showed me her latest kill. Too bad it was the stuffed animals my dead grandmother had given me as a child that had a lot of sentimental value to me. FML
Today, and for the past month, I'm so lonely that I fall asleep holding my teddy bear's paw for comfort. FML
Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML
Today, like every other day, I suffer from insomnia. On returning to the bedroom after a very late night shower to hopefully get some rest, I sat on my cat. I jumped up quickly and smacked my face against the cupboard. I then looked back to see if she was OK. I'd sat on my Squishmallow. FML
Today, at the age of 20, I still have a bed time. It is strictly enforced by my cat via endless meows if I am up past 11 pm. FML
Today, while lying in bed, I was so lonely that I put a heavy blanket in front of me so it felt like I was spooning someone. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Pathetic? Hardly! Those monsters under the bed are only slightly scarier than the ones in the closet. It's a damned good thing you have such good protection.
josebaseball11 14
Well if you haven't been attacked by monsters yet, then they're doing a good a job.
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Comments (271)
JokersHQ 21
Although it sounds stupid, it's not pathetic to get in touch with your inner child sometimes. Don't beat yourself up about it too much :)
crazytwinsmom 25
I was hoping OP was a guy for some odd reason.
fading09 4
You're not the only one OP!
sxm 13
Everyone has their own way of falling asleep. For example I myself play relaxing nature music. It's not the same as your stuffed animal barrier but each person has a different way to sleep that makes them feel safe and relaxed.
blackonblight 33
Keep up the rituals that comfort you. No shame. I'm 23 and I always have a plushie to snuggle. If I don't, I can't sleep.
sanecatlady 13
That's so cute! I'm 39 and I still collect and sleep with stuffed animals, although I don't think they'll protect me from monsters, real or imagined. :)
AshleaJstudent 16
I sleep with my fish light on because I can't sleep in the dark. We all have little quirks. Trust me, you're in the range of normal. :)
jayray313 21
Seek therapy
superbexxx 4
I still do this, even if my boyfriend is stay over. No meer man can defeat the bedtime mosters
Anon4076 3
It's ok OP, I'm 20, and I still sleep with one of my stuffed animals...