Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while lying in bed, I was so lonely that I put a heavy blanket in front of me so it felt like I was spooning someone. FML
Today, I felt so lonely that I went on an online chat website and pretended to be a girl just so someone would talk to me. FML
Today, I was so lonely that I pretended I wanted to buy something from a telemarketer so that they would keep talking to me. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend making the bed, at 2 AM. And he wasn't so much making the bed as he was holding a pillow while lost in thought, looking at me. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over to cheer me up after I'd had a sleepless night. He thought it would be a good time to propose. Unfortunately, it coincided with me yawning. FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend and his parents, who I haven't known very long. I ended up falling asleep. That doesn't sound so bad, until I woke my drooling self up by snoring extremely loud. FML
Today, I'm so lonely that I actually convinced myself it was by choice. FML
Today, I tried to talk to my boyfriend about our communication problems. He fell asleep. FML
Today, I finally noticed how lonely I am when I realized I was petting my couch while reading a book. FML
Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML
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Top comments
jerryj 27
Well, did you pretend that he woke up and you had an argument with him? Who ended up sleeping on the couch?
xlord 27
At least you have a good imaginary boyfriend and not one that stumbles home piss drunk at 4am.
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Comments (58)
patrickeli 15
Lol, I hate to sound insensitive, but that's amusingly pathetic.
kayladayla 13
Wow that IS really insensitive
sophiehelen 32
OP is already aware it's pathetic seeing as she's put it on FML
Earths_Venus 25
It's not pathetic. It's unrealistic. People in relationships don't creep into bed noiselessly, they dive in and cuddle up to their partner. Unless she's pregnant or he's in the doghouse :P
ohSNAPyall 27
^It is possible that OP has never had an intimate relationship with someone.
jerryj 27
Well, did you pretend that he woke up and you had an argument with him? Who ended up sleeping on the couch?
xlord 27
At least you have a good imaginary boyfriend and not one that stumbles home piss drunk at 4am.
Wolfparable 22
Uh has that happened to you and your imaginary boyfriend?
7cheer7 5
it sounds like a very sad story
DrMario_ 16
Awh, OP, that is adorable! Great imagination. Don't lose it :)
JayDay_123 18
I think someone needs a teddy bear.
badluckalex 23
there is a giant one at Costco!!
jvfelicio 13
I own it. I dont even want a gf anymore.
sydneysays 15
I have done the same thing. Commence cuddling with a pillow. But really, hang in there.
aimzskee 30
That is actually cute (:
lexiieeex3 32
That's so sad... I'm truly sorry.
Arrow26 4
Now you can fart as you please and pretend its him as well. Let go a good rip, then roll your eyes and say "ugh, babe!" while staring at a blank space on the wall.