Today, is the first day of my honeymoon. It has been 6 years since I took a "real" vacation. We have 3 kids and a small house, and now we have 9 days alone in random hotels to do what couples do on their honeymoon without kids... Day one, I got my period 7 days early. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it's the first day of our honeymoon. My bride just informed me that she invited her ex-husband to come, so he can spend time with the kids. He will be here in 4 hours. FML
Today, it's day 9 of my honeymoon. It's also day 8 of my period and day 7 of food poisoning. FML
Today, after we recently married, my husband wanted kids and I didn’t, so we agreed we’d have at least 5 years child free, then have one child and one only. I just tested pregnant. Despite all our precautions, I actually got pregnant on our honeymoon. FML
Today, it's the first evening that my husband and I will have without the kids in 8 months. We had been looking forward to it for ages, and my husband had even bought me some lovely new lingerie for the occasion. Guess what? I just got diarrhea. FML
Today, I was getting everything ready for mine and my husband's first wedding anniversary. Flowers, check. Crisp new bed sheets, check. Silk underwear, check. Crippling cramps and an early period, check. FML
Today, it's the first day of a long-needed vacation after weeks of stress and overtime. I'm having such intense period cramps, I'm bathed in sweat. FML
Today, I'm on the last day of my honeymoon in Ireland. My wife and I have an amazing hotel room and a huge bed. She's passed out drunk and if I even touch her, she needs the bucket next to our bed. So much for finishing our week on a "fun" note. FML
Today, it's one day away from my wedding and two days away from our honeymoon trip. Today is also the day that, after dodging it for two years, I got Covid. FML
Today, while on vacation, I think I met my soul-mate, and quite possibly the love of my life. My vacation is to celebrate my 8-year anniversary with my husband. FML
Today, at 36 years-old, I will be leaving to go on my first ever vacation. Aunt Flo held off until yesterday so she could come with me, and she's BAD this month. We were planning on going to the beach. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Lounia_fml 8
how does she deserve this? xD Like really. YDI for being a woman, YDI for leaving your kids.. I wonder what stupid excuses will come up for YDI xD
Anderling 33
That sucks. Mother nature is awful. Hope things'll look up soon.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (285)
ifzombiesattack 0
if your husband is uncomfortable with the blood, you could always use a female contraceptive so none of it gets on him?
florza 0
if its in hotels, go for it. not your sheets to dirty up. room service will hate you though
BeQuickOrBeDead_fml 0
Ohh. I didnt notice that someone already posted a comment like the one I just did lol xD The saying is still funny though :D
crankdatIRISH 0
Oh hell no. That must suck. FYL.
lmmmr 0
You sound incredibly immature.
aback 5
94 is so girly and dainty. I take it he won't be in the delivery room watching his woman give birth.
kewlcat 0
diaphragm!
Ravenzin 2
I'm guessing you are 12? Lots of people have sex during periods,get over it.
iamafish 0
#109, i don't think 94 will be fathering children anytime soon since he'll probably be too grossed out to ever have sex
IMakeEarthquakes 0
I feel so bad for you!! That's such a b*tch! I hope you enjoy your honeymoon aways
cuts28 0
when the red river flows, take the dirt road
shakemup 0
******* a girl on her period is like ******* a bottle of Ketchup.
livingdeadgirl 0
That really sucks. But they say if you can walk through mud, you can f*** through blood.
isthisonetaken 0
guess he won't be eating you out. gross on his part if he chooses too anyway. it will make ur new hubby look like he just ate a basket of redwings.
synacious 0
The amount of stupidity contained within the comments of this post baffles me.
NGM_47 0
Hope it works out for you :)