Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, while in class, a cute boy came up and asked me for my number. I giggled and wrote my phone number on a piece of paper and told him to call me sometime. He gave me a weird look and walked away. He was asking which number math problem I needed help with. FML
Hey you
Today, my friend asked me if I flirted with any girls during our shift. I said, "No, not any I could think of." He then told me there was a note on my windshield that said, "Call me" with a phone number on it. After my shift, I went to my car excited and read the note. It was just a penis. FML
You IDIOT
Today, I was approached by the head cheerleader, and she asked for my number. I was so excited that I gave it to her without question. Then she smiled, and walked away. Too bad my girlfriend was right behind me when it happened. FML
Today, I decided to to gather up the courage to ask the cute boy in my math class for his number. He gave it to me, and I texted him later that night. But little did I know he actually gave me the number of the creep in class who is always grabbing my ass. I ended up asking the creep out. FML
Today, I got really excited when I got an email from a guy I've been flirting with in my math class. Turns out he thinks I stole his calculator and wants it back immediately. There goes my chance. FML
Today, a cute girl I know in passing approached me very nervously and blushing like mad. She gave me a note with a number on it, said to call her, then ran away. When I called the number later, it was one of those rejection hotlines. What the hell? FML
Today, a very pretty girl came up to me and asked me for my phone number. Very pleased, I give it to her with a huge smile and tell her that I can be reached at any time. I then watch her go back to her group of friends. My number was for her gay friend, who then meekly waved at me. FML
Self sabotage
Today, I was drawing while on the train, when a very good-looking woman looked at my work and said, "Wow, she's pretty. Is it supposed to be me?" She'd said it in a flirty tone, but before I could stop myself, I'd said, "Nah, it's just a generic face." FML
Lovesick
Today, I was working at my job as cashier. This really attractive girl who often comes in walked in, so I mustered up the courage to ask her out by writing my number on a dollar bill. She paid and the amount her change happened to be a dollar. I go to hand her the money when she sees it and says, "Keep the change!" FML
Today, I was looking over the schedule for errors and circled a group of mistakes before handing it to my manager. When she handed it back to me, she gave me a weird look and I immediately noticed that the group of numbers I had circled formed a giant penis shape on the paper. FML
Top comments
gr8sexpectations 0
i hate how everyone on this site thinks that a cute girl or hot guy talks to them because their gonna get laid, only to find out that their life is ******
perdix 31
The winning comeback: Well, maybe you'd like to draw a back on my penis?
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Comments (100)
gotit4cheap 0
suck alotta dick bitch!!!
phuckurlyfe 0
At least she was nice enough to inform u there was a penis on ur back.
fueledbyshar 0
Win.
91_92_93Gal 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!
HIJKay 0
LOL FYL, but that is hilarious.
bonnieandclyde44 0
hahhahaha
mrzero 0
well you should tell her, that's me and my size, would you like to ride on it???
samantha_durano 6
I hate it when people draw dicks on me, lmao.
likeomgwhat 0
how could u jump to the conclusion that shel ask you 4 your number when she just said your name?
Pearljammer001 0
hey what are friends with sharpies for?