Funnymann
United States
Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Maidstone, United Kingdom
Today, I woke up to find my face covered in scratches, some of them bleeding. I was rather puzzled, as I don't have a cat. Then I realised that the feathers in my pillow had stuck out and scratched my face. I was attacked by my own pillow. FML
Amy
Prince George, Canada
Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML
Anonymous
Today, I woke up with a carpet burn. From sleeping. Alone. In my bed. FML
argh
Houston, United States
Today, I woke up to the faint memory of being drunk enough to draw dicks on my own face in permanent marker. FML
permanently scarred
Today, I was assaulted and knocked out by a girl at school for talking to her boyfriend. I woke up in the emergency room. After she knocked me unconscious, she took a knife and carved her initials into my face. FML
Girl-of-very-little-brain
Canada
Today, I woke up at midnight crying, stood up to turn on the lights and face-planted into my wall. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML
Bonk
United States
Self report
Today, my clumsiness reached a whole level when I hit myself in the face with a hammer hard enough for blood to come out. FML
HomeAlone
United States
Today, I went into the bathroom and got angry upon finding that once again, no one had bothered to put on a new roll of toilet paper. And then I remembered that I live alone. FML
Hayleey_079
United Kingdom
Today, a picture fell off of the wall in the middle of the night. It hit me smack bang in the middle of face. FML
Top comments
luvuall 0
It was Jigglypuff
susieKiute 0
paranormal activity?
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Comments (228)
farmgirl 3
Do you lock your door?
FernandoTorres_fml 0
"I live alone" Obviously not.
StormGirl142 24
Win.
makemebrauh 0
OMG THE WRITE CLUB!!!!!!
makemebrauh 0
what's the first rule of wright club?
FernandoTorres_fml 0
Spell "write" correctly?
AxCxDxDx 0
win!
Bruno89 0
u sir, win
xxmollyxx 25
fight/wright, take a joke!
FernandoTorres_fml 0
Shhh molly, don't talk about fight club, it's the number one rule.
Poke_my_mon 0
FERNANDO! NOOOOO. You just broke a rule of fight club!
Anteezy 7
Ewww a Liverpool fan, getting 4th spot would be a great achievement for you guys this year that kind of says enough. Gunners to win the title!
maibiz 0
I hate you so much right now.
michaelscott69 0
bitch, stfu you broke the rule!
Jekkiie 0
the gooners suck.
jaysaysss 0
thats not a fml thats a mlia (:
fruhe 0
Freaky!
catkat1988 17
Someone needs to educate me. What does it mean to have your face "sharpied"? Sounds like a serious FYL, though, no matter what the intruder did to your face. What I don't get, though, is why a burglar would do something to someones face while they were sleeping? Why not just nick the stuff you came for a leave without risking to get caught?
GrungeFan94 0
"Sharping" someones face is when you write/draw crude stuff on someones face. Funny as hell. And why the hell are you asking why whoever did this? Like we'd know the answer...
xandervincent 0
Because this is much more hilarious than than stealing.
mshafty 0
I would say they stole the OP's sense dignity and safety! which is way better then some crappy TV they probably own!
tisiphone_fml 0
Sharpie is a brand of permanent marker. Its become a verb because its so famous.
Mapholisto 7
A "Sharpie" is a brand of permanent marker. To have your face sharpied is to have had someone write/draw on your face with one.
SHARIFFO 15
Hey guys, I was just on Facebook, when I realized something called: TMDL. It's short for www.ThatsMyDesiLife.com, it's exactly the same like www.FMyLife.com, But their's is NOT as Popular as FML. WEIRD!! Is there a competition between the Sites?
spoo 24
I only get to click thumbs down once. FML
danii_s2 0
someone else obviously has a copy of the key.
Cristaderzi 0
Cameras AND I'd be sleepin at a friends house for a while!!