Today, I woke up with a headache. My girlfriend said it might be from the night before, explaining she punched me while I was sleeping because I was snoring in her ear, and she dreamed a bee was attacking her. I'm not sure if I'm more concerned that she punched me, or that it didn't wake me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up with a pounding headache. My wife tells me that last night I woke up from a nightmare, screaming, tried to run away, and knocked myself out running headfirst into the bedroom wall. So she put me back to bed and went back to sleep. FML
Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
Today, I woke up with a headache and a bruised forehead after my husband full-force elbowed me in the head last night in his sleep. It wouldn't be so bad, except for the fact he has zero memory of doing it. FML
Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML
Today, I woke up to a punch in the face. My girlfriend said it was because she dreamed that I'd bought all her friends Taco Bell but didn't bring her anything. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML
Today, before I went to bed, I watched a terrifying movie with zombies. I woke up with a headache, a bloody nose, and my mom standing over me frantically asking me what was wrong. Apparently I had been "fighting the zombies off" in my sleep and had been punching myself in the face. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML
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Top comments
mama2b3 20
haha that's funny. I sleep through almost anything, but I think getting punched in the face might wake me.
x805xUnknown 6
Maybe she punched you so hard you fell into a deeper sleep? Lol.
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Comments (73)
strandedinalimo 0
I hit my boyfriend in bed sometimes...
DGross 8
Mighty Swords FTW!!!
Lythiaren 8
What kind of gigantic mutant bee was she dreaming about, if she was punching to defend herself from it's attack?
Lythiaren 8
its* Stupid iPhone autocorrect. *grumble*
thoughtcrimeno1 0
she was dreaming of the talking bee from family guy: mayor bee! mayor bee!
nina2010 0
Lmao. I thought the same thing!
skullbashd 3
or she was leeks in the bee episdode of futurama
IAMLALA 0
I love you Alan
Sirducki 0
time of the month much...
redbluegreen 41
Remember what happened the last time you used your "sword" Alan? I'm sure you can never look at your cat the same way again. Are you sure you didn't mean something more like a dagger? A sword is a bit, erm... Only a true, -cough- star can wield such a thing, let alone fulfill its full potential.
imNotWavy 0
I have to say I really look forward to snickerdoodle' comments, random but just a thought. OP FYL btw.
Eddie_Paints 0
Snick's a carpet muncher? I ain't buying it! But if you wanna say you are.....it's a free country. For now.
megissocool 0
omg lol same actually haha oh what has this website come to?
buttshapedfruit 0
lmao!
LadyAshley 0
I'd be more concerned about her punching you and you not waking up...
junolee 0
there it is again..that ydi speech oh no! i'm sorry! please don't correct my grammar!