Rosie
Wesel, Germany 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up to the sight of my boyfriend playing a game on my iPhone with his penis. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
StiffPvtParts
🌶️ Spicy
Today, after a night of drinking, I awoke in the early hours of the morning to a sight of my roommate playing with my penis. FML
fizzie101
San Francisco, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Talk to me baby
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend jerking off to what I thought was porn on his phone. He was actually beating it to Siri's voice. FML
chewybarseventy
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML
Taylor
Dubuque, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend drove 20 miles to come see me. The closest we got to intimacy was him showing me how he could unlock his iPhone 5s with his penis. FML
doesnttastegood
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML
kylie
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my boyfriend texted me, and asked if he could come over to 'have some fun'. Thinking we were going to do it, I freshened up. Turns out his idea of 'having some fun' is playing Doodle Jump and Angry Birds on my iPod. For three hours. FML
urgg
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML
coldwetnose
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML
ps3isbetterthanme
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up and my boyfriend was already awake. Feeling in the mood I slipped off my nightdress and looked him in the eye. He looked me up and down, smiled seductively, reached over... and turned his PS3 on. FML
EpicBunBun
🌶️ Spicy
Man City
Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, I thought he went to change the music on his phone. He'd actually stopped mid-action just to check sports scores. FML
Top comments
ADuckOnQuack_fml 0
That is... ******* awesome.
tpuff 7
Boss status
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Comments (159)
tpuff 7
Boss status
SparkleyTurtle 4
Is your boyfriend six?
Gtroll 4
13- Obviously op's boy friend is not not 6...-.-He's clearly 7. :D
Damn_Hippster 11
Your boyfriend is a champion, he deserves a medal.
XAnNiHiLaTiOn 6
Was his penis erect?
LoganBurrito 6
I hope so, 13. I hope so...
Skittlepickle 13
******* GENIUS. Wish I had a penis... Guess I'll have to use my nipple :(
jay75euro 0
You can play on my phone. Lol nipple W!N
Drigr 9
Well, I've known people to try and use their noses and elbows on their touch screen phones, he just chose a different appendage, so I'm not gonna call him 6 for it. If anything I'll call him an ass because I hadn't thought of this before him! And since 34 mentioned it, I can't believe the comments basically calling him immature and a child, if it was something about a girl using her nipple everyone would be like, "awesome!" or if they were a pervy guy, "that's hot, can I watch?"
jerryk 2
There's an app for that.
LolFMLnot 10
Then you force him to lick the screen of your phone ;) just to take revenge
Snorlax_Snarf 10
I moderated this...
zimripple 8
Gross 63... Your sick
DontModMeDammit 10
64 that comment is only appropriate if you modded this with your penis.
emmagillespie24 11
#13 I'm not sure of a six year old would have that much control over his penis.
LolFMLnot 10
67 there is something called "a joke" You should search it up
Nutty4Muffs 3
I'm surprised how many people HAVEN'T used their phones with their penis.
ly0ntamer 1
I'm more concerned that OP is seeing someone that doesn't have an iPhone. You dating beneath you!! YDI!
Tylerdre 6
36- well played pedo bear.... Well played.
Drigr 9
130, not all apps are cross platform on phones. Two that come to mind are Valor and Thumb (previously known as opinioned). I'm sure there are other. Unless of course you would go so far as to say I am "beneath you" for having a droid and not an iphone.
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
67, if you find THAT comment sick then this site really isn't for you -.-
ChickInGreenVans 12
What a man..
ADuckOnQuack_fml 0
That is... ******* awesome.
GRRSOM 7
Seemed like he he lacked a stylus. Stylus: for a more accurate game of Drawsomething.
TrueTriage 16
That's how you get 3 stars in angry birds!!
ibenj 1
I sometimes type with my nipples but Imma have to try that!
xoconnie 8
56 - you just took it too far man..
wannaplay 1
He's the frog on YouTube.
brackaman 18
Fingers?? Pshh... Who needs those things?
vanillacocoa 6
And she still used her iPhone to submit this...
Hiimhaileypotter 53
If my boyfriend did that, I would laugh sooo hard.... Honestly I think your bf has a nice sense of humor ;)
SparkleyTurtle 4
Men need to evolve
Capt_Awesome137 0
4-you understand men now :p 103-we are comfortable with our current evolutionary spot tyvm
onlychildFTW 34
Ha until you see all the white staining on your phone afterwards. Haha.
vaughant 5
Ahh Hahahaha this has 69 thumbs up:) hahaha
tinkdatank 15
Hell yea haha
CookieGirl4ever 13
I'd think it was funny too… as long as it wasn't my phone.
harvaman20 0
He knows how to handle himself. Lol
amiritelol 3
At least he wasn't playing with your ****** with his penis, amirite.net?
sinking_fish 12
Uhm, no? That'd be a bad thing, why?
amiritelol 3
Because she was asleep... amirite.net
BigShOtz07 5
Who hasn't tried this?
KiRaKaT 9
I would assume girls haven't tried this lol
LoganBurrito 6
Do the truffle shuffle!
Bonzer 2
I haven't. But now i will.
TarieBoo 2
i text with my nipple._. yeah i know im wierd :(
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
I think this FML just gave all males a new idea o.O
jaystreet46 4
I haven't. And 93, you lie! Pix or it didn't happen!
TheMathMajor 26
93! I've tried that, but only because there was an FML about it XD
br0ccoli 15
Germaphobes
chibidemon 13
A female friend of mine does this...I think it's cool
shots1996 8
It's not really that hard No pun intended
jane_marie 12
1 iphone 0 OP
Enslaved 38
Whack a mole?
steelflax 5
Ha
Enslaved 38
I'd be impressed if he cracked the OP's screen.
chibidemon 13
Even better had he managed to cut his penis on said crack
sirpantselot 22
Hahahaha the imagery!!
Enslaved 38
123
Honestly_Lainey 21
Well... Was he winning the game or..? Can't leave us hangin, OP :P
KMtheDrummer 6
HIGH SCORE!
bizarre_ftw 22
Pun intended?
xBunnehAddictx 6
Dude, that is amazing. I would probably piss myself if that happened to me. X3
jay75euro 0
You mean squirt
Bonzer 2
No, she means piss.
bizarre_ftw 22
What about that would make you want to get drunk?
Roflsauruz 12
112- there was nothing there about getting drunk... Just urination resulting from the hilarity of it all. :/
PlaidPanda 9
141, I'm guessing 112 is from england where "piss" means drunk. Never really understood why, but, "I'm pissed" = "I'm drunk."