argh
Houston, United States
Today, I woke up to the faint memory of being drunk enough to draw dicks on my own face in permanent marker. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Today, I fell asleep on the way to a pool party and woke up covered in sharpie swastikas and dicks. FML
snow
Today, I woke up with a massive hangover after passing out at a wild party the night before. Apparently my friends couldn't find a marker, because I woke up with dozens of dicks drawn on my body and face in henna. I have a job interview today. FML
Funnymann
United States
Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML
Fingkids
United States
Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML
nosey
Mountain Ash, United Kingdom
Today, I woke up with my face covered in blood. Turns out that yesterday at my colleague's birthday party, I got so drunk that I started yelling "Nappy time!" before falling out of my hammock and face-first onto the concrete ground. FML
maturity
Sydney, Australia
Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML
Anonymous
Just a prank, dad
Today, my son got drunk and managed to colour in my bald patch with permanent marker while I was asleep. It’s super noticeable and I look like a complete prat. Plus in a few hours, I’m supposed to be on my first date since my divorce 12 years ago. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML
Jade
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night because I was thirsty. In my groggy state, I grabbed the first bottle of liquid I could find, opened it, and took a sip. It was nail polish remover. FML
Top comments
Curfman 0
I bet they were bigger than yours too
loserman67 36
You my friend are suffering from deeply recessed homosexual tendencies. The influence of alcohol introduced into your brain function has let you "drop your guard" so to speak and you reacted by opening that "closed chamber" and let your deepest desires loose. By drawing several phalluses on your face and I am probably safe in saying that most of them, if not all were pointed at your mouth you were able to realize your dream of being orally penetrated by several well hung men. Go with your desires, do not keep them repressed, open the "well-spring" of sexual freedom you have been guarding as a secert all these years. $300 dollars please..... BTW - this post was funny as shit!
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Comments (58)
perdix 31
Looks like when you go to work, you'll be ready to take dictation.
craftyones 0
That's as ugly as two boys *******.
br0ccoli 15
Now that's a real ******** move!
DocBasterdwanabe 4
that must have really drew the ladies :)
KiddNYC1O 22
That party last night was awfully crazy...
mlexi21 5
I wish we taped it:)
jlp549 5
Feeling a bit cocky?
obviousboy 8
You drunk trolled yourself. I salute you.
jnds2010 3
Use axe body wash
Doxy 22
Forever alone huh, no best friend to make an ass out of you in the morning by drawing dicks on your face.
maiamafia 6
Did you also happen to draw an arrow pointing to your mouth, nothing wrong with your subconsciousness love affair with dick in yo mouth.