Today, I woke up to my two year old crawling in bed with me and saying, "I poop". Normally this would be ok, but this morning she decided she didn't need a diaper. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML
Today, my 2-year-old woke up from her nap with a full diaper, then decided to climb down from her bed and got stuck under the railing, leaving a stinky trail of poop everywhere. FML
Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML
Today, I took a shower while my two-year-old slept. In the 30 minutes it took me to shower, get dressed, and go back to his room, he had woken up, taken his pants and diaper off, and smears crap all over himself and his bed. FML
Today, my one year-old took his diaper off and peed on my chest while I was sleeping. FML
Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML
Today, my toddler is starting to realize when she has a dirty diaper. How do I know? She walked up to me with a shit covered hand, saying "Poop Mommy! Poop!!" FML
Today, my son took a nap quietly for the first time ever. As I went to wake him up, I realized why. A previously poop-filled diaper came flying at me when I opened the door. FML
Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML
Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
magentaballoon15 8
now that's a shitty situation
Garyy_fml 11
and there's 5.) The assholes who see the overused pun, and wants to be a *****, so they point it out.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (54)
Calyx_fml 22
Breakfast in bed.
NomOnShroomz 14
Delicious. Mind bringing me a cup next time you do?
captinawesome 0
you will save a lot on diapers
Lexiloulynn 2
That's your fault, not to judge your "parenting" or anything, but your two year old should have been out of diapers a while ago, shouldn't be roaming around by itself if it's not potty trained, and defininetly should have better motor skills. That's a few things you should probably work on!:)
iRiS890 5
STFU. Most kids aren't full potty trained until about 3. It's the morning and the kid went to her parents room. Thats not really roaming...
Eringobrag88 0
Better motor skills? Where do her motor skills come into play?
joa76 3
What? Most kids are potty trained between two and three, and you have no idea how long this kid has been two. It might be the day after their birthday. And "shouldn't be roaming around by itself if it's not potty trained"? Kids can walk when they're one. When kids can walk, they walk around the house. What do you want to do, keep them in their crib/playpen/high chair/your arms until they're potty trained? And considering the kid most likely took off their own diaper, I'd say their motor skills are just fine. If you're saying that because of the word "crawling," it says the kid crawled into bed. The bed is probably almost as tall as the kid, it's not like it can just sit on it like an adult.
frescheina 0
you obviously don't have kids. shut up you're making yourself sound stupid.
sweetbabysweet93 10
well said
sweetbabysweet93 10
here's something you should work on, quit being an ignorant bitch. and the other comment was well spoken. not yours
krista2009 0
so true I hate people who judge other people especially about their kids
Saltime 0
Same here. No sugar though; I'm on a diet.
AnthonyWalsh94 0
Sounds like a shirt. Situation. Haha
EnterChoose 1
Was she supposed to put the diaper on herself ?
joa76 3
Most likely she had one on and took it off herself. Eventually kids can do that and often will anytime they're not wearing something over top.
deefan101 11
they should be potty trained by that age!
Shanokie 2
this comment made me lol, obviously you have never potty trained a child...I hope your future 3 year old son pees on you while you are changing his diaper.
thinkinboutyou12 0
Your kid is going to grow up to be a genius. I'm sure of it.
frescheina 0
My kid was potty trained at 2. that didn't mean she didn't feel like taking her diaper off and throwing shit every where sometimes. A lot of idiots replied on this one