Today, I woke up to large spot of blood in my underwear. This wouldn't be too big a deal if I didn't have a penis. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I'm on the last few days of my period. After nothing came out the whole day, a dollop of blood suddenly poured out, somehow managed to entirely circumvent the giant pad I was wearing, and went straight into my underwear, pants, and the chair I was sitting on. FML
Today, after I wore a pad last night, I woke up this morning, took off my underwear to use the bathroom, and a huge period glob flew hit the rug and splattered everywhere. The globs got on every piece if clothing I wore. I then had to clean what looked like a crime scene. FML
Today, I was naked and the wife tried to flick my bum with a wet towel. Unfortunately I bent over at the wrong moment and the towel cracked right against the underside of my dangling penis. The whole underside is bruised, it hurts to pee, and God help me tomorrow if I get morning wood. FML
Today, I tried on a pair of pants in a dressing room and they didn’t fit. However, my period came suddenly and left a massive bloodstain, so I had to buy them anyway. In case you’re wondering, the pants were white, the cashier was male and cute, and he definitely noticed. FML
Today, I got my period at school. I didn't notice until a boy asked me if I'd killed someone in my pants. FML
Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML
Today, my penis isn't so small that I pee on my balls. It's so small that it fits between the toilet and toilet seat, causing me to pee all over the floor full stream. FML
Today, whilst trying on a pair of jeans, I got my genitals caught in my fly. I'm a woman. FML
Today, I woke up to find out my cat pissed in my laundry from last night. This includes underwear, so I had to go commando. I grabbed an old T-shirt and pants at the bottom of a drawer and left for school. Turns out the pants had a hole in the crotch and my period was due. FML
Today, I woke up at my brother-in-law's house in the middle of the night to discover I had a watery shit in my underwear. I thought I was safe because had on a Depends, I wasn’t and had to change my sweatpants too. FML
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Top comments
Karau_fml 12
Well I guess now you are going to have a ******
pohoon 12
wet dream gone wrong
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Comments (107)
hoosiergirl94 31
You just became a woman
Astrobomb 21
hemorrhoids
DP_Deadpool 5
it's hard to be a girl on her period when you are 17 and a guy
Rainyknights22 16
Or it could be something a lot more serious. As much as some women would enjoy the thought of a man having a period so that the opposite sex could literally feel our pain for the sake of understanding, the fact is that men do not. So you should contact your doctor. Well wishes to you.
zaidthunder1 27
Maybe you banged it somewhere while sleeping? Else you have a medical condition.
slut4coffee 9
A friend of mine had a tick on his manhood and it crawled up into his pubes. He said it bled like nothing else. Look closely OP I hope it's nothing serious.
bobsanction 18
Front or back?
stp9782 11
#meriod
Ruskiy_Cherep 18
Was it your penis?
gdeekay 9
Hermaphrodite?