Today, I woke up, showered, and began brushing my teeth. When I started to brush my tongue I gagged, like usual, and threw up a little. What's unusual? I threw up a cockroach. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML
Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML
Today, I was drinking lemon juice through a straw. After finishing half of the drink, I noticed there was a cockroach in my straw. FML
Today, I was expecting lizards, spiders, and weird local insects in my hotel room. What I got was a cockroach on my toothbrush. A very tiny cockroach. FML
Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML
Today, I was getting ready for my first day at work. Right before leaving the house I brushed my teeth thoroughly one more time to have a fresh breath. While cleaning my tongue, I went too far, which made me throw up. I was 20 minutes late for work. Good start. FML
Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML
Today, I woke up with a dead cockroach and its guts all over my forehead. My boyfriend responded by laughing and saying "Poor guy, never had a chance to see the world." FML
Today, I coughed so much I threw up, then whilst recovering from throwing up, a fly flew into my mouth and I ate it. I then promptly threw up again. FML
Today, I was dumping some old milk in the sink and noticed it wasn't going down. Assuming food was clogging the drain, I stuck my hand down in it to remove the food. I removed a blueberry and half a cockroach. FML
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Top comments
DinosaursAreCool_fml 8
That's nasty (Cleveland voice)
shellzy 20
Oh god...I just threw up a little. Cockroach free at least.
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Comments (371)
TheRealBruce 12
Oh noo! Eww that Is so gross
jwade11 12
Hey so ur really from quahog?
speshlk37 13
Jeffrey! Anonymous threw up a cockroach! ...oh noooah!
goomonk 2
That's different
metallicshadow 16
how the **** did that happen?
KronikSplakkn 4
****(roach) muncher.
RockstarRN 10
Tons of insects will crawl/fly in your mouth when you are sleeping without you noticing. I'm guessing that's what happened.
bharmon31 0
Yeah I have heard that before! :( gross!
kaykay20 0
Call the exterminators soon as possible
supimnyancat 9
.. The ****?
mintcar 10
Brushing, you're not doing it right. Gagging like USUAL?
jillianmathers12 13
That's what I was thinking
camster8393 1
Some people ( like OP and myself) have a sensitive gag reflex and so we often gag when we brush the back of our tongue. Not all that uncommon.
kaoriblossom 8
I gag as well but if a cockroach ever came out then I'm pretty sure I'd have a massive spazz attack o.O
obamathellama 0
*******.
VictoriaDesiree 0
^ wth
kittie11 0
That's 'effen grips!
deviable 9
Gagging sure, but throwing up? That's not usual.
chickenwalrus 14
or she might be pregnant. my english teacher is pregnant, and when she brushes her teeth and doesnt gag or puke she runs around telling everyone. and she randomly pukes for no reason. this is why i like having testicles
fyreangel 6
OPs gag reflex might get set off really easily.
xlibra259x 0
ewww, that's so gross. how can you not feel something weird like that? I'd get your house checked out for cockroaches now. Just yesterday I was watching this show Infested and it showed thousands of cockroaches making a house their breeding ground, check it out while you can. hope you feel better.
godlyelephants 0
i saw that
boredblonde 17
Your subconscious must really have a taste for bugs.
somewizdom 15
Brushing your tongue?! Now that's weird!
skeebers2718 5
Your actually should brush your tongue, you need to get the plaque off if it. Your just not suppost to gag while doing it
Blueglasscup 18
-Orabrush ad-
JinxosGirl87 0
The majority of the bad breath germs is on your tongue. :P
Enslaved 38
22, you never brush your tongue? You must have a winter coat on there!
Penn2894 6
Do you sleep with your mouth open and live in a place where cockroaches are common? If not, you might have a problem.