Today, I woke up on my boyfriend's bedroom floor. When I asked him why I was there, he said I'd gotten too hot, so he rolled me off his bed. I have the flu and a fever. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had a horrible case of the flu. I have a fever of 102 degrees and I can't breathe through my nose. Choosing to sleep it off turns out to be enough for my mom to call me a lazy fuck and scream at me for doing nothing all day. FML
Today, I was in bed with the stomach flu. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to fart in the fan next to our bed, which caused me to vomit all over myself. FML
Today, I passed out in the shower with my boyfriend. He just left me there. FML
Today, it was my birthday. I spent all day in bed, sick with the flu. My boyfriend then broke up with me by text, because he didn't want to risk getting sick by doing it in person. FML
Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarrhea in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping body. He rolled over to whisper, "I heard everything." FML
Today, I was sick and laid up in bed, and my boyfriend decided to bring me some soup. Just as he reached the bed, he tripped over his own feet and spilled the soup all over me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. When I asked why, she replied with "You don't go out anymore. All you do is lay in bed." I've had the flu for the past week. FML
Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend got so drunk that he was sick in the taxi, sick on me, then sick on himself when he was sitting on the toilet. What's more, I can't get into bed because he's been sick all over my half of the bed. So I'm sleeping on the sofa tonight. FML
Today, I wasn't feeling too good, and took my temperature. I had a fever, which I told my boyfriend who was laughing hysterically when I told him. I asked him what was so funny, turns out he's been using the thermometer to take our dog's temperature sometimes. Rectally, of course. FML
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Top comments
Edo369 8
Thats pretty rude... I wouldn't have woken my girlfriend up, I would've moved instead.
freshberries22 17
Your boyfriend is better than me because in my house when my boyfriend's sick I quarantine his ass. Still I'm sorry you ended up on the floor op, that was a cruel thing for your boyfriend to do especially when you're sick. Feel better op, but before you do make sure you give your boyfriend a big sloppy kiss for kicking you on the floor.
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Comments (86)
mecamp 4
You need to get rid of him ASAP... The insensitivity does not end after marriage. I should know, I married an insensitive prick!!!
Eorlas 31
You poor thing! That is awful, OP. If he's uncomfortable it's his fault to be honest. I'm sure you didn't just spring that fever and flu while you were asleep, so he knew what he was getting himself into before he went to bed.
Iamrebecca 2
What a Barstead dump him
mrtonyanderson 20
Sorry op I laughed
mgrabi01 10
Dump his a$$!!! He is a piece of s**t who definitely does not deserve you. He would rather stay cool during the night than rather care about your well being while being sick. F that! Move on. You deserve better than scum :).
Werken247 14
Here let me help you with that; *ass *shit *****. You're welcome.
hurleyjoe 8
At least he didn't scream "THIS IS SPARTA!!!" while he did it.
KiddNYC1O 22
He took a risk by sleeping with you.
MisterMarkuzy 3
Wear seat belts next time
qr_fml 21
He did a chandler, "tuck and roll"
dodzin 9
Roll him off your life. He is a selfish retard!