Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up with the worst hangover of my life. My best friend comes over and informs me that I had sex with my girlfriend's two best friends last night. Awesome! Then I realized her best friends are guys. FML
Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML
Today, I found out that my best friend kisses me while I sleep. We're both guys. FML
Today, I woke up from a night of crazy drunken sex with a guy I had met at a friends 23rd birthday party. The lights had been off when we had stumbled in to his house the night before. When I opened my eyes today, the first thing I saw was his family picture, complete with his wife and son. FML
Today, I woke up to my best friend laying next to me vigorously touching herself. She thought I was asleep. FML
Today, my best friend and my ex-boyfriend went on a business trip, got drunk, and ended up sleeping together. Now they want to start dating. FML
Today, I was driving my best friend home when he admitted to being gay. I was glad he could trust me with a secret like this. Until he admitted to having sex with my boyfriend. FML
Today, my best friend, with whom I have been in love for years, kissed me, hugged me, held my hand, hooked up with me and told me that he loved me more than anything and wanted to be with me... until he sobered up and his girlfriend got back to town. FML
Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the man with whom I've been in love for months. Too bad I was too drunk to remember a thing. FML
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Top comments
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
No ****.
blackbird31 0
You may want to reconsider the "straight" part.
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Comments (146)
nikkibihm 0
oh no you are not straight budd
CourtneyDanielle_fml 9
I think it's time to think that one through, OP.
letsgetPHYSICAL 0
I hope someone wore a condom >:C
OrgasmicBunnies 9
and lube. :O
Edokun 0
Omg without lube that must hurt ALOT! o.o
Unknown374848 2
That comment and the FML itself reminded me of this joke: '3 Gay men were sitting in a jacuzzi/hot-tub naked, when all of a sudden a condom floated to the surface. One of them laughed and asked 'Right, who farted?'.
phoebeast 0
not anymore you're not! ;) hahaha
katiechap8 0
damn
ironhead_fml 20
Right! Damn!!!!!
SirPlagueRat 6
"We're both straight males." No you're not...
testthecoal 5
now where did mr. gerbil run off to?
sourgirl101 29
Was it good for him too? Hey, I know male friends claiming the same thing but they were high on "X". Oh and they were also gay!
xNikkiez 0
Rofl, Oxymorons. :P
Gi510 0
Can everyone say Broke Back Mountain...
Steve95401 49
I wish I knew how to quit you.