Today, I woke up at 2am and went to use the toilet. I sat there doing my business, when I heard a voice whisper my name from behind me. I live alone and the toilet is right up against the wall. I screamed and ran back to my room, then went without sleep for the rest of the night. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I still have my ridiculous fear of being heard on the toilet, and I can't go if people are around. I'd just sat down on the toilet when three of my housemates started chatting immediately outside the door. I had to sit silently until they were gone. For half an hour. FML
Today, I woke up at night to go to the toilet. My Dad was doing his thing with the toilet door wide open. I saw, screamed at the top of my lungs and peed my pants in horror. Now my throat hurts and I'm too embarrassed to look at him. FML
Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML
Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML
Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML
Today, thinking I was alone in a public bathroom, I started singing the words to my favorite song. A minute later that I heard a toilet flush, so I just sat there petrified. The other person sarcastically picked up the singing from where I left off. FML
Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML
Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML
Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML
Today, I knocked on the door of the bathroom to make sure nobody was in there before I walked in. Then I remembered I live alone. FML
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Top comments
Peeep 17
The chamber of secrets has opened!
ZelmaSlayer 30
Paranormal Activity: The FML dimension.
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Comments (142)
Peeep 17
The chamber of secrets has opened!
drunkmunkey 24
or he has a really creepy neighbor
ARSCON 15
That speaks parseltongue
vikky538 29
Its not chamber! Its commode of secret from toilet!!!
WD_Stevens 22
He's got an entrance to the ministry! That's just what you want when leaving work - someone ******** on your head.
fatman1970 25
It sounds like someone wanted to Slytherin!
dyscomonkee 12
You're all idiots
mds9986 24
83- you accomplished a lot.
Isuckatthis 18
Wow, dude
aspecialspecial 21
Sounds like you were scared..... Shitless!! *baduntiss*..... Okay I'll see my self out..
Ben12345_fml 18
Well, you're ******
LilMissCanadian 22
He was probably imagining things.
heartofhannah 28
Or he has a neighbor that likes to play pranks.
KxHoneyCombxP 24
Omg! That sucks!!! I would have anxiety the rest of the night and have a house exorcism the next day!! Just reading this freaks me out a bit.
Morning_fml 22
I don't think you know what an exorcism really is.
Lalala579121 28
28, it could be a demon so an exorcism could work. A seance would make more sense to do, though.
gracehi 33
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! NEVER ever do a seance when you're being haunted! It only encourages the spirit(s)! Only talk to it to tell it it's not welcome! Don't sit around a table with a damn medium and ask it what it wants! Who cares what it wants? YOU want it to leave you the **** alone, or should anyway.
Lalala579121 28
What if it's Casper though? Why be rude to such a friendly ghost?
BrokenDreamer24 15
Okay, 71, there is a BIG difference between a seance and a exorcism. Please use google and educate yourself.
gracehi 33
90, Please educate yourself on how to read a thread. Nowhere did I suggest that an exorcism and a seance are the same thing. I was responding to 69's assertion that OP ought to do a seance rather than an exorcism.
jenninyc1128 17
A house exorcism? I think you mean Have the house blessed...
zeffra13 31
Is that wall against a neighboring apartment or an outside wall? Maybe someone was messing with you. Or maybe, since you woke up at 2 am, your brain wasn't quite awake and played tricks on you.
lyricalservant 21
Either of the two it seems. Or it could be that he has some actual entity that's haunting him.
Talonshere 14
Boogeyman was based off of a real incident.
pokemyeyes 23
Or maybe it was just a nightmare but one of those very realistic ones that takes a couple of days to realise
gracehi 33
It's possible it was a waking dream. I've had those. Although, I've never experienced one when I was able to get up and use the toilet, and I've never heard of one like that either. Waking dreams are usually accompanied by sleep paralysis.
kelzo5 5
Probably was the latter
Ikashy73 14
This has actually sort of happened to me more than once. Usually it's just that there was some wind and my mind played tricks on me and made me hear my name instead.
shadowhunter426 11
That is terrifying. For your own safety, please hire someone to cleanse your house of spirits. I'm not a professional, but I've seen a few movies and I know how this is going to end.
toastbrot 9
I hope thats sarcasm gone wrong
A07 48
"I'm not a professional, but I've seen a few movies" sounds like something to put on my CV
THEXOCDXGAMER 5
How did this get down voted so fare this is some funny shit she wrote !!!!!! lol
DoomSkuller 28
Call the Winchesters
gogo44444 28
YES SUPERNATURAL
Lalala579121 28
Or Zak Bagans, since he loves investigating phony incidents.
whitetiger13131 26
Who you gonna call?
EvilTurtle 35
The landlord
heartofhannah 28
Finally someone agrees with me!
ZelmaSlayer 30
Paranormal Activity: The FML dimension.
olpally 33
That scared me a little...