Today, I woke up at 2am and went to use the toilet. I sat there doing my business, when I heard a voice whisper my name from behind me. I live alone and the toilet is right up against the wall. I screamed and ran back to my room, then went without sleep for the rest of the night. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Shy bowels
Today, I still have my ridiculous fear of being heard on the toilet, and I can't go if people are around. I'd just sat down on the toilet when three of my housemates started chatting immediately outside the door. I had to sit silently until they were gone. For half an hour. FML
Night terrors
Today, I woke up at night to go to the toilet. My Dad was doing his thing with the toilet door wide open. I saw, screamed at the top of my lungs and peed my pants in horror. Now my throat hurts and I'm too embarrassed to look at him. FML
The sound of silence
Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML
Not a morning person
Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML
You OK in there?
Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML
Today, thinking I was alone in a public bathroom, I started singing the words to my favorite song. A minute later that I heard a toilet flush, so I just sat there petrified. The other person sarcastically picked up the singing from where I left off. FML
Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML
Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML
Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML
Today, I knocked on the door of the bathroom to make sure nobody was in there before I walked in. Then I remembered I live alone. FML
Top comments
Peeep 17
The chamber of secrets has opened!
ZelmaSlayer 30
Paranormal Activity: The FML dimension.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (142)
interesting33 37
Potentially someone put a recording there to mess with you?
AwkwardKarma 18
You probably didn't hear anything but paranoia led you to believe you did.
greeneyedx 23
I'm sure it was just your tired brain, OP. Stuff like that happens to me when I'm falling asleep more often than you'd think!
allforfun 23
Our fire station is haunted. It's only funny until it happens to you!
demix_fml 32
Creepy ?
turnabouttrial 21
Not something I was looking to read at 4:30 am sitting on the toilet, myself.
qsyumkhan 6
today,i woke up at ram and went to use the toilet.I sat there doing my business, when me.I live alone and the toilet is right up against the wall.i
audreylword 5
question is..... did you take the time to wipe first?????
rec_chem 22
Take your medicine.
tiger820 20
you probably fell asleep on the shitter, I hope you at least wiped your ass before you got back in the bed !