Today, in a bizarre power move, my cousin flashed me her tits. I thought it a mistake and didn’t acknowledge it, until it happened again for much much longer. I was terrified. Prior to this I hadn’t even realized she had fake tits. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sat awkwardly and pretended like I didn't notice my cousin discreetly trying to masturbate while talking to me. This isn't the first time anything like this has happened. FML
Today, I accidentally sent a nude to my cousin, instead of the girl who shares the same name. She liked it. FML
Today, I accidentally touched someone's boobs. It was a man. And I noticed that they were bigger than mine. FML
Today, my mate was bragging about the nudes he was getting from this random girl, he proceeded to show me... It was my cousin. FML
Today, I caught my cousin's husband ogling me at a party. I decided to talk to him, but each time he'd avoid me. Eventually I confronted him about staring at me; he then pointed at the front of my dress, my nipple had slightly snuck out of my low-cut dress. FML
Today, whilst visiting one of my distant cousins for the first time in years, she came onto me. After gently explaining to her that this was inappropriate, she broke down in tears. Whilst I awkwardly comforted her, she started stroking my inner thigh, apparently still trying to seduce me. FML
Today, after ten minutes of squishing my boobs together for my boyfriend, trying to get him to stare, he glanced at them then blankly said "I've seen better tits on my mom, so baby just stop that" and smiled. FML
Today, I was showing my boss a picture on my phone. I didn’t expect her to take my phone from my hand and continue to flip through photos. I anxiously motioned for her to give my phone back, only to realize she had already swiped to my nude picture. FML
Today, I saw boobs, in person, for the first time. Too bad they were my mom's and I'm 27. FML
Today, I went to a family reunion and made the mistake of wearing the same shirt as my cousin, who is known for always wanting to be the center of attention. She took one look at me, pointed, and said, “Oh, I see you’re copying me now, huh?” Then, my aunt overheard and said, “Well, she is your cousin, so it’s not like it’s a crime.” FML
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Top comments
ODBeefalo 10
reverse power move... ignore it, and treat it as a joke if she ever brings it up for some reason. by simply not responding, you remove any perceived power (however little it may be). if it ever becomes a thing act like you thought she was aiming for some kind of weird prank or something.
Anderling 33
That’s sexual harassment, what the hell
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Comments (8)
Yudith 28
What are you afraid of? Does your cousin have sawblade tassels on her nipples? Will she turn her tassels around and chainsaw through tables to get at you?
ODBeefalo 10
reverse power move... ignore it, and treat it as a joke if she ever brings it up for some reason. by simply not responding, you remove any perceived power (however little it may be). if it ever becomes a thing act like you thought she was aiming for some kind of weird prank or something.
Anderling 33
That’s sexual harassment, what the hell
JackWood 21
Show her your nuts
Iamthebanzai22 21
And the problem is?
RichardPencil 32
How is this a power move? Does she know you're afraid of ****? If so, I can help. Meet me at a strip club and bring a stack of bills. I'll show you how to handle ****. And by "handle," that will be different if your bills are $1s or $20s.
Chiefanatic 2
Personally, I’d be a smart ass & tell her she’s got to do better than that to get my undivided attention. Just ask her why she’s flashing you her ****. You might not like the answer, but at least you can find out what is going on with her. What happens after that who knows?
OfficialMrD 3
SWEET HOME ALABAMA