Today, I woke up and felt that my arm was sore. I got so drunk last night, I got an unprofessional tattoo of a penis. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML
Today, after a drunken New Year's Eve party with friends, I woke up with a penis on my cheek. It wasn't a drawing. FML
Today, I woke up after a heavy night of drinking, with my laptop dead on my chest. Apparently, I had attempted a bit of digital penile oscillation, but passed out instead. FML
Today, I woke up to the faint memory of being drunk enough to draw dicks on my own face in permanent marker. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my tattoo artist brother-in-law. I was so wasted that I agreed to let him try working on me. I woke up with a tattoo of an animated marijuana plant smoking a cigarette. This'll look just great when I'm defending clients in court. FML
Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML
Today, I went to get my first tattoo. Before we started, the tattooist told me to just relax and embrace the pain. I guess I did that too well; I kept getting an erection throughout. FML
Today, after a night of drinking, I awoke in the early hours of the morning to a sight of my roommate playing with my penis. FML
Today, I woke up after a long night of drinking with my friends. I vaguely remembered visiting a tattoo parlour, but nothing prepared me for the sight of the words "YOLO" and "MOFO" tattooed across the fingers of my left and right hands. Now I'm officially a bandwagoning douchebag. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off, only to learn that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML
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Top comments
mfinn 0
ydi for getting that drunk and being an idiot
bwynin 0
Because a proff tattoo would be better?
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Comments (116)
mfinn 0
ydi for getting that drunk and being an idiot
repyourcliche 0
lol i know, right? still, not as bad as that woman who got jedward's faces tattooed on her ass... while sober.
Maxine17 8
WHO IS THIS CRAZY WOMAN?!
vark 0
what does jedward mean?
Firesprite2009 0
Jedward = John & Edward Grimes, ex-contestants in the X Factor, which Joe McElderry went on to win.
crazytoaster 2
Heavy drinking! Do dumb shit, become the butt of every joke!
mwz777 0
at least it's "unprofessional" If it doesn't look like a penis say it's a... cat or something lol
rockon4life 2
I thought you couldn't get tattoos done when drunk of high or was that just a rumor I heard?
clumsylittleme 11
94- Well I don't think you can but, because it was unprofessional it doesn't matter... I think.
alisonyankee 0
HAHA! idiot
bwynin 0
Because a proff tattoo would be better?
pegasus77 0
Most pros wouldn't do a tattoo when you are drunk.
Lia_Mackenzie 4
Yeah. When I got mine, they made me sign a consent form stating that I had not consumed any alcohol or any other intoxicating substances before they'd even touch me. OP, sucks to be you. Though I'd like to know what made you pick THAT, of all images...
ChibiChibi_fml 28
Wow, your comment was really unnecessary because #7 was responding to a comment made by #3 asking if a professional tattoo would have been better. They may not have quite understood the fact that #3 was being kind of sarcastic in their statement (or they may have, who knows) but there was still no need for condescending attitude.
caticaticati 3
The reason number 7 said that was probably to offer a reason why the OP stated that the tattoo was unprofessional, so that she didn't get bombarded with comments about how it's fake because professionals won't give tattoos to drunks.
iggywig 0
Owned.
pumpkin_cat 0
Sounds like you need AA dude.
chairlee 3
You are SO cool.
daydreamstar 7
ummm. ydi big time. get to an aa meeting or something... but, what does it do when you wiggle your arm?
cocacola999 27
Does scratching your hand feel better now?
youthink_fml 0
Some people are idiots. Some people can't handle their liquor. Are you A and/or B?
CYNNER 0
Ha ha. teeny weenie on your arm