Today, I went to my cousin's farm with my family. First I was pooped on by a goose, peed on by a puppy, bit in the face by the mother dog, fell through the floor of the barn loft, and without knowing it was electric, rested my hand on the horse fence. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while letting horses out to switch pasture, one ran at me, sending me through the electric fence and into a mud puddle. Wrapped in electric fence, I sat in that electric mud puddle, screaming every time it shocked me. Help arrived, once they'd had a good long laugh. FML
Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML
Today, my date took me to visit his farm. As we were walking, a wild rabbit darted past me and startled me. I tripped and fell face first into cow dung. FML
Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML
Today, I went with my family to visit my aunt, who lives on a farm. My brother told me that cows are ticklish and convinced me to go up and tickle one of the cows. The cow clearly wasn’t a fan, and I ended up being chased right into a lake. FML
Today, my best friend told me to face my fear of cows and hop over the fence in with them. This resulted in me being chased by a raging cow, and thrusting myself head first over a fence. FML
Today, I went to my girlfriend's mom's horse barn. Then I stepped in horse poop. Also I am full of dust. Dusty boi. FML
Today, my dad tried to help me overcome my intense fear of horses (due to nearly being killed by one as a child) by taking me to a ranch. Within 30 minutes, a horse bit my face. FML
Today, while riding a massive draft horse, the horse thought it would be fun to walk under a very low apple tree that sat level with his back. A branch hit me and made me fall off onto a coil of barbed wire, twisting my ankle in the process. FML
Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML
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Top comments
wolfe37 0
yeah you don't belong on a farm...stick to the city
GuyWithAGuitar 0
lMFAO. This could be a country song. Now alls that needs to happen is for your spouse to leave you and your dog to die.
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Comments (116)
michaelcarell 0
so a normal trip to a farm?
laviniaa 0
i'm gonna say fake.
DameGreyWulf 1
WELCOME TO RURAL AMERICA, CITY BITCH. ENJOY YOUR COW PIES.
Metsfan2009 0
That must have been a bad day
horneyhic 15
I do wat kinda fences these ppl are talking about but I've been shocked by an electric fence, spark plugs, and a hottub they all hurt like bastards. And honestly u suck at country life I've lived in the country 18 years and haven't had half that happen to me
dancerjrm9 0
or its just bad luck?
dancerjrm9 0
i don't get what all this is about city slickers? just because she doesn't live on a farm year round doesn't mean she lives in the heart of boston or that she deserved any of that
horneyhic 15
No It doesn't but any country person nows it's called a hay loft not a barn loft
horneyhic 15
And yea single unbarbed strand of wire atteched to insulated mountings = ELECTRIC
TrAnMu 0
sounds like a rollicking good time
ellysa_fml 0
Ha but the electric fence isn't that bad...
rambles 0
what luck! FYL