Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house. She'd told me not to ring the doorbell and just come in so that I wouldn't wake her dad up. As I walked upstairs, her father walked out of the bathroom naked. We locked eyes. I can't get the image out of my head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML
Today, my new friend and I went out to a concert. When we came back to her house, she ran upstairs and left me alone. Suddenly, a naked man came into my view and I stared at him, horrified. Great way to meet her Dad. FML
Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML
Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML
Today, while looking at a house to buy, I opened a bathroom door. There was a naked man on the toilet. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting for him to get out of the shower. Bored, I sent my friend a picture of myself pretending to make out with his bear rug. After the photo shoot, I looked in the doorway to find his dad staring at me. FML
Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to have fun at school. So, we went into the locker room. We were making out for a couple minutes when the door opened. It was the principal, who also happens to be her dad. FML
Today, while I was sitting on the toilet, my toddler swung the door open. We just bought the house, and we have no curtains. Our new neighbor, who I haven't met, was mowing her yard. I stood half-naked to close the door, and our eyes met. I froze. She waved. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Hopefully he didn't get angry that you were inside his house.
themarshal_fml 6
I was gonna say "It's not gay unless you look into his eyes" but oh well.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (99)
perdix 31
He winked at you and said, "Who's your Daddy?" and now you can't use that phrase anymore with his daughter.
HeyArnold91 8
First impressions are everything
severe_fml 3
You should have whipped out your junk for comparison. Great ice breaker.
supportcommand 17
Do what you can to shake the image and go do what you went there to do.
goodgood_fml 5
Don't worry. The sight of a freshly showered man who's dripping wet and staring at me is so HOT!!
Nabee143 3
23 Who said he was showering? Just because he came out of the bathroom naked doesn't mean that he was showering. He may have been taking a dump. Or whacking off. Either one, not so much of a turn-on. Lol
goodgood_fml 5
28, stop killing my joy!!!
RedPillSucks 33
Even if he wasn't taking a shower, he might still be dripping. Mostly from wanking off.
DocBastard 40
Try walking into any gym in any city anywhere in the world. If that image of her father bothers you that much, he number of elderly wrinkly scrotums sagging down below knee-level will absolutely kill you.
shawnaishere 14
*the (hopefully no thumps down because I corrected the GREAT doc )
ManInTheMachine 20
*thumbs me Oh my, pot, how dark you look today!
SerendipityRose 26
That's it! I now know for certain that I'm grounded from FML... TJ had just rolled back over when read your comment & snorted so loud in laughter that I startled the cat, who jumped in the air & landed on his head. Damn you & Perdix both... I'm doomed...
DocBastard 40
I made a typo...shit. Now I must end myself. Goodbye, cruel world! *puts head in microwave*
Jaxx66 21
50... I refrained from asking the question previously, but I'll ask it now; Why are you reading FML in the bedroom? While someone is sleeping, no less.
emag_eht 18
50 You should just go to the living room or go to a cafe to read FML in the morning if you know he's going to get angry and possibly break your iPad. Go somewhere where you won't bother him or just don't go on FML in the morning if you can't hold back your laughter.
SerendipityRose 26
To answer you both, I have insomnia, but my Husband hates sleeping without me in bed with him. So, even though I don't sleep, I curl up with him while he does. Also, reading the iPad isn't as bright as watching the tv & therefore doesn't disturb him as much. The bouts of laughter I just couldn't help. Besides, after I woke him up, I rubbed the back of his neck & shoulders for him & he went right back to sleep.
Enslaved 38
Looks like no one expected him to be up.
perdix 31
Which "up" are you referring to?
lininnes 6
Chill boy. It's her dad not her mum.
emag_eht 18
Which makes it ever worse for the OP
osf777 2
His house, his rules. You're lucky you're still alive to post this.
sjdbeinska 4
I used to work in a retirement village when an old shriveled man walked up to me and threw his penis in my face. THAT is an image that you will NEVER unsee
RedPillSucks 33
Was it still attached to his body when he did that?