Today, I went on a blind date at a restaurant. While looking at the menu, my date said "Who even likes kweetch? Gross." When I realized she was trying to say "quiche", I corrected her. That pissed her off. Now I'm at home, alone, trying to decide which hand is going to keep me company tonight. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "Nope", and walked out. FML
Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. My date spent the whole time at the restaurant on his phone and didn't even try to show interest. Thankfully I'll never have to deal with this individual ever again. FML
Today, I went on a date. After we finished our meal, I had to use the bathroom really bad. When I said so, my date totally lost it and accused me of planning on climbing out a window and ditching her. "Fuck that and fuck you!" she said, then stormed out, leaving me with the bill. FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my friends set up. Not only did my date visibly recoil at the sight of me, she ended up trying to convince me that we're actually cousins. When I told her how absurd that was, she muttered, "Fuck it" and left. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a restaurant. My date took one look at me and said pityingly, "Stuffed your bra, didn't ya? Seriously, why even bother?" The douche then started trying to lecture me on "false advertising". FML
Today, I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she ordered the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so you shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss you later." She looked at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML
Today, I went on a blind date, even though the whole concept freaks me out a bit. My date showed up with his sister, who sat at our table and critiqued everything we did, from how I chewed my food, to the way we nervously laughed. He hardly said a word the whole time. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. When I arrived, the guy looked nothing like his profile picture. We started chatting, and things were going fine until he asked, “So, what do you think about my date?” I replied, “Uh, I think it’s going well!” He responded, “I was talking about the waitress. I’m married.” FML
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Top comments
sn24swim 13
if shes going to leave you after something stupid like that, you're better off without her OP
tj4234 36
For the record, I like quiche.
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Comments (138)
sn24swim 13
if shes going to leave you after something stupid like that, you're better off without her OP
Lct1196 31
Not to mention that she has horrible taste... Quiches are delicious!
delude 26
I don't even get how someone can pronounce quiche with a t
Killswitchknot 20
If she would seriously leave for something like that, maybe OP is better off with his hand keeping him company.
sturschaedel 27
Well, OP could've worded it differently, not directly correcting her but say something along the line of "I happen to like some kinds of quiche." But then again, would you rather be with a girl who, in a restaurant, chose what she likes, or with a condescending bitch who feels the need to comment on stuff she doesn't like, calling it, and in extension all the people who eat it, gross, without even knowing if it might be OP's favourite food? I'd say OP dodged a bullet there.
tj4234 36
For the record, I like quiche.
kmarie22_613e 25
My stepson begs for it.
BrassWing13 11
How cliché
teentee401 37
Quiche is amazing!
DoomSkuller 28
Spinach quiche is good
Crescent_Moon 17
So do I. And its stupid getting pissed off at someone for correcting you when you say something completely wrong.
tdawg91 17
Pumpkin, spinach and feta quiche is the bomb!
more4me 27
So do I ! Quiche is delicious!
ajs1987 15
I also enjoy a good quiche.
sourknickers 4
Can't beat a cheese and bacon kweetch.
thefmlman2011 37
That's called Quiche Lorraine.
Agtthepw 21
C'est elle la quiche ! You're not missing much. If she doesn't like quiche she can't be that awesome. ;-)
connectthedots 7
"She is the quiche"? I could be wrong, but I'm fairly sure that's what "C'est elle la quiche" translates to...
wakemeupplease 21
Ok that's a contradiction... quiche is awesome and delicious... she can't be quiche just saying
keyofdestiny13 24
19 is right
minissaussette 25
Actually, @19, it's a French expression, it means being an idiot or being incapable of doing something in particular (like a sport, for example).
more4me 27
I agree with #3! C'est même une cruche!
Bulldozer36 21
As a grammar Nazi I commend your correction and suggest the "Stranger".
limegreenpoopie 31
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
The woman is always right. Understand this and you'll never be lonely. :P
stingray112 24
Well in this case, the girl in the story was dead-ass wrong and so are you. Try again
Vestin 18
#5: I'd rather be lonely than hypocritical.
ARetardedSeal 24
Just... just stop #5
grajax 24
Nah, you should shut up.
fakedsincerity 32
I'd rather be corrected when I'm wrong than have people agree to just keep me happy, like I'm some fragile thing who can't handle facts and others opinions. ?
wakemeupplease 21
Bitch please!!!!
WipeHour 11
*ahem* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA that is all
JKPwnage 27
This is probably the wrongest (is wrongest a word? Wrongest is now a word) comment I've ever seen.
rocker_chick105 31
While I don't agree with it, I'm pretty sure it's just a joke. I've heard it from a lot of older, married men who are content with their marriage. I don't think #5 meant it in all seriousness. But then again, this is FML
limegreenpoopie 31
Lol it's fun watching people go batshit crazy about a joke; score!
JayGatsby 25
It's fun watching you get down voted for a stupid ass comment. Score!
tdawg91 17
Women are wrong quite often, look at OP's date and your eyeshadow choice
Blue_Black_fml 21
Yes #94! Especially the eye shadow choice!! What the **** is that?
Mc_Knapkins 10
@94 shots just fired i repeat... Shit... Just..... got...... real.....
limegreenpoopie 31
The woman is always right. Understand this and you'll never be lonely. :P
stingray112 24
Haters gunna hate. Sorry about the date OP (gasp that rhymes).
laden_swallow09 35
Potatoes gonna potate.
ODST_Panda 12
hate hate hate, sorry about the date,date date, shake it off , shake it off
gintwinsmoore 20
try the left hand first...
ToxicTyrael 26
That's what OP's name says.
mewfasa35 12
Sorry op, but if she's going to be that shallow, then you are definitely better off without her! Find a girl who could have turned you correcting her in to a humorous moment, instead of a bitchy one!
19990231 29
If she gets that upset that you correct her over something small like that just imagine when you actually get into a fight.