Today, I was unbelievably horny so I sent a kinky text message to a boy I really like, only to receive the reply, "Not tonight, I'm raging Minecraft, having a wank, and going to sleep. Try again tomorrow." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I felt kind of horny for once, so I texted my boyfriend to let him know he'd be getting some action later. He replied, "I'm gonna fucken murder ur pussy when I get back!! :D" And just like that my sex drive once again crashed through the floor. FML
Today, I got a text message while driving home. I checked after arriving, and found it was a kinky text from my boyfriend, so I sent him an even kinkier reply. He later raged at me, because I somehow should have known he was showing off his phone to his mom when I sent my reply. FML
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
Today, I was feeling really horny. I decided to send dirty texts to my girlfriend. I sent the first and she didn't reply, so I sent more and more and then I got one back saying 'Stay away from my little girl.' FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to have a sex session with my boyfriend. I sent him a suggestive message, and 30 minutes later he texted me back to let me know he was done. FML
Today, I sent a kinky text message to my boyfriend. Within minutes I got a reply of, "Whoever this is, fuck off and give my girlfriend's phone back." Apparently I'm so bad at writing sexy messages that my boyfriend thought it was a prank from someone who'd stolen my phone. FML
Today, I thought it would be hot if I sent my boyfriend kinky message. He didn't reply so I sent a few more. 10 minutes later I got a reply saying, "Honey, this is his mom and you should be a little less desperate." FML
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Top comments
fallout125 2
yes minecraft is that awesome
dudeitsdanny 10
Get a vibrator, and turn on some ****. And, word of advice, don't sext a boy you just happen to like. It won't end well. He will either ignore you or turn you down.. Or use you. Very few of us would date a girl we can have, anyways.. And those of us who would are, in majority, part of the ignoring group. Get some class with that vibrator, too. Try not to look so desperate.
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Comments (185)
Jollymanroper 1
Just payback for when she's on her period. jokkkessss
heytheresophie 0
you might want to work on your skills a little bit.
tehspy1337 0
lol I wonder what she said
SirBedevere 0
Sounds like one of my nights...
Krista835 5
Haha sucks that you got denied, but he was only a guy you like, not your boyfriend or anything so I'd lean toward YDI As for him it's sad that he's that addicted to the game unless it was his way of letting you down I dunno. PS Definitely don't try again tomorrow XD
gDwane 0
fap > wank who says wank?!
jess6blondie9 3
Who says fap?
deadlydeadd 2
yeah who says fap
geeksaresexy 18
irl most people I know say 'wank' online pretty much everyone says 'fap'
thisusernamewast 0
At first I thought he was talking about chicken wings D:
kkf92 0
I don't understand why everyones blaming you. ok, true don't sext. but he's obviously a nerd loser
jess6blondie9 3
Or he's not interested in her. That doesn't make someone a 'nerd loser' because they didn't want to sext a sleeze.
fthku 13
#88, you're one of those girls who would call a guy gay just because they wouldn't go out with you, aren't you?
geeksaresexy 18
My other half plays WoW and my lodger plays minecraft they both still have girlfriends. This guy clearly just isn't in to her..
kai_ngo 0
I wouldn't be surprised if that "nerd loser" will make more than you in life. Seriously, what's with shunning the intelligent people? Spending time playing a game rather than ******* some ***** that randomly sexts you does not make one a loser. Whats with our society these days, idolizing sex and being unintelligent. -sigh-
cutiepie292929 18
don't bother with a gamer. it will always be games before u anyway
DaMan326 1
Or generalize all of us, that makes sense too
kai_ngo 0
I'm a gamer. My girl always comes first, so what the hell are you talking about? Don't generalize people you hardly know about.
muffinlizzie 7
Exactly, that's an untrue realization. My guy and I are both Gamers, but if it's important, the other person comes first. Nerds have hearts you know.
muffinlizzie 7
*generalization not realization
julian24245 0
You can't top minecraft.
redjabba10 0
jus txt me ;)