Today, I was teaching my daughter how to drive. We were passing by a merge lane; I told her to slow down and let a green car merge in front of us. She said, "Fuck the green car" and sped up, colliding with it. Apparently she didn't know that would happen. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my daughter out driving to practice for her road test. I told her to make a left into a parking lot. She missed the 30-foot wide entrance, but not the two-foot wide tree. FML
Today, I took my driving test. As I was about to turn at a green light, a car sped toward us from the other direction, running a red light. My instructor failed me because I stopped to avoid getting rammed. Apparently I should have kept going, because it was my right of way. FML
Today, while in the car with my mom, she gave me a lecture about how bad of a driver I am. During that process she ran a red light and hit a car. FML
Today, I took my 15 year-old daughter driving. I yelled at her for not going safely around corners. On the way home, while demonstrating how to drive right, I went around a corner and hit a cement truck. FML
Today, I stopped at a red light, when I noticed the car in front of me was in reverse. I honked at the driver, hoping he'd realize and place the car in drive. He thought the light turned green and immediately backed into me. FML
Today, my mom was driving with my brothers and sister in the back seat. She was turned around talking to us, when my sister told my mom that she missed the light. She ran it, then screamed at us about not paying attention and noticing your surroundings. FML
Today, I saw a woman still texting on her phone as she started to drive away when the light turned green. I made sure to stare her down and give her a dirty look because she wasn't paying attention to driving. She laughed as I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, while I was driving, I saw my driving instructor from high school walking on the sidewalk. As I waved to him, I rear-ended the car in front of me. Guess I really showed him how much I learned from him. FML
Today, I watched as the teenage neighbor girl tried to parallel-park between me and my wife's cars. She was doing pretty well until she backed into mine, got scared, hit the accelerator and ran into my wife's. FML
Today, while in the drive-through for Taco Bell, I hit the car behind me after forgetting my car was in reverse. It was in reverse because I was worried the old lady in front of me was going to forget she was in reverse. She didn't. FML
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Top comments
Druu 53
And that's when you reply, "**** getting you a driver's license."
\ 28
That, my friend, is a fine example of "YOLO." Or more accurately, of natural selection.
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Comments (101)
nightbirdblue 27
She just has a Bad Habit. She is really okay, just that green car gave her crap.
MzZombicidal 36
Are you joking?
jnaust 8
It's a song by The Offspring
nightbirdblue 27
Thank you #57. I should of expected it though. The Offspring aren't like Ke$ha or whatever other things the kids are listening to these days. Besides that song and the band wasn't playing on the radio station everyone was listening to, even when it was new.
TruthBeTold9605 8
Well at least nobody got hurt.
Sal_G_63 5
I'd love to see her try and say "**** the police!" If that were a cop.
rememberkids 14
looks like someone's not getting her license! I think that's a good thing tho...
Axel5238 29
Wow that sucks OP. Sounds like at this rate she might be a future contributor to textsfromlastnight.com Straighten her out if that accident didn't do it already.
buckdharma 38
So did the airbag provide her well deserved slap upside the head?
LennyComa 39
******* women drivers, Nah in all seriousness your daughter should probably not drive as she sounds like the kind of driver that would slip it into cruise control and then have a nap
azzy94 7
Just out of curiosity what exactly did she think would happen? Kids just say the darnest things. I'm sorry about the car OP hope everyone was safe!
Vitualamen 11
Who says Grand Theft Auto has negative effects?
simsgirlgem 25
and then you tell your daughter that if she's not going to listen to you you're not going to help and she can take the bus everywhere from now on