Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML
Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML
Today, while I was shopping, I spotted a lady who had the last of an item I wanted in her cart. She went off to the dressing room, so seeing my opportunity, I went and grabbed it from her cart, and put it in mine. I hadn't noticed her bratty-ass daughter next to the cart, who then yelled, “I saw that! Mommy! Some lady's stealing from your cart!” FML
Today, I was grocery shopping when I left my cart to grab an item. I returned, and started pushing the cart again. Halfway through the store, a furious lady confronted me, demanding her cart back. I had to walk back in shame to find my own actual cart, which was now nowhere to be found. FML
Today, I went to an over-crowded grocery store. As I reached the front of a long line, I noticed that a cart had been abandoned in everybody's way. Trying to be helpful, I moved it to the side. An enormous woman then shoved me and yelled at me for "pushing her property around." FML
Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when a large lady and her friend blocked the aisle I was trying to go down. After saying, "Excuse me," twice and being ignored, I pushed my way through. After getting past, I looked back and noticed she was glaring at me while signing to her friend. FML
Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML
Today, I was at the store when I saw that a cart in the checkout line next to me was starting to roll away and the owner hadn't noticed. I tried to help by reaching out to stop the cart from moving, but when the owner saw me with the cart, she began to hit me for trying to steal her purse. FML
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, a customer at the Walmart I work at had a hissy fit and began throwing merchandise everywhere, including at my face, because we are Canadian and don't have a show called "Extreme Couponing" for "devoted shoppers" like her. FML
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Top comments
TheFamilyElf 17
You have every right to be upset! Bacon ain't a joke! Bacon is serious!
heybib 5
It's bacon
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Comments (425)
heybib 5
It's bacon
toenibbler 14
and bacon is no laughing matter.
mcintosh123 15
Move to Canada lots of bacon :D
LunaDragon 10
Canadian Bacon is a lie, it's really just ham. :/
RainbowMaster88 5
Mcintosh123 is sexy.
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
You should think of it as a favor. She's taking in all those calories for you...
biggestfan23 11
52- keep your gay comments to yourself
FMLshark 12
Come after her and push her. Watch her roll down the aisle. Grab your bacon.
phantumgrey 6
Bacons a free for all
Demonfish 14
I want a bacon sandwich now...
nado13579 12
Come here to Canada, we have lots of bacon! (Well I can't have anything pork in my religion. But I adore turkey bacon. :) )
Meettitan 14
If you hurry you might be able to buy all the discount beer before her.
KhrystinaS 0
Haha legit. Why do you care so much over that disgusting stuff? There are more important things to focus on. Like your health(:
Allahu_Akbar 1
Nor can I. I can never see myself putting bacon in my mouth. It makes my stomach churn.
evilplatypus 39
Why live to possibly be one hundred and be healthy when you can live to seventy and be happy? People have screwed up priorities.
KeyboardWarrior 10
If clogging your arteries makes you happy...
Awes0meperson 10
To answer your name: a lot of things. You just made a perfect example with your FML
MeeshaMeeshaPup 8
If you have ever watched Epic Meal Time, you know bacon is some serious shit.
THE_A_TEEN 28
KhrystinaS, I understand your point(and I respect that), but here on the internet, Bacon is the food of the internet and god himself. Basically: IT'S ******* DELICIOUS!
ripresno 10
Well what religion are you [^¿^]
Greenshee 0
Its America. Home of the fat.
The_Hitdude 12
^ Ignorance at it's best.
hotPinklipstick 24
141-midnight :)
nado13579 12
182- If you're asking me because of my earlier comment, I'm Muslim. We can't have pork because it's not very clean or healthy. And apparently people like to thumb someone down for not being able to have regular bacon. Doesn't bother me though, but it goes to show how disrespectful some people can be over the smallest things. Thumb me down all you want, I don't regret saying what I can and can't have. *shrugs*
Michelle_74617 1
That's Walmart :]
TiMe_oF_dYiNg13 6
Turkey bacon is amazing!
A7x4REVer 3
47 - no we have real bacon, I mean look at epic meal time :P
tifani322 13
She doesn't play around when it comes to bacon...
wardo 4
135 are you ******* retarded? Humans are meant to live, not exist. Dumb ****...
coldashell 23
I would eat bacon til it killed me. I have bacon popcorn and bacon chewing gum. Bacon is its own food group.
nado13579 12
257- Well I can have turkey bacon and I love it! Do you guys still hate me if I like and am able to have turkey bacon?
ajeppsen 25
187 I take it you've never been to America?
DespairFaction 11
You don't get in between a man and his bacon.
ThisIsMyReign 4
Artery clogging goodness. Should have hopped in your cart and chased the bitch down!
baconstrips 12
Don't **** with fat woman and bacon. Trust me I know
trueblue170 13
nado13579, I LOVE your profile picture. AND turkey bacon. :D
Ameronot 14
125... Why do you use a Swedish YouTuber as your avatar? xD
nado13579 12
330- Yup, turkey bacon is amazing!! And thanks, I love Tails!! He's my favourite video game character and was my first crush when I was 6. :P And I love your Profile picture. Leave it to Link :D
TwiztedYuri 9
best source of happieness in the world is BACON
TwiztedYuri 9
Bacon strips and bacon flips. now for the money shot...BACON SEX TEASE WITH SOME BACON LUBE
Autobot93 10
146- with Jack Daniel's it is the ultimate combo.
deadrising084 1
135-it only clogs your arteries if you eat way too much of it-_- just because someone eats it doesn't necessarily mean that they are unhealthy or overweight. Healthy people can still enjoy themselves to something like that every now and again
G1ZZY 0
it is not just 'bacon'
Roflsauruz 12
Dude, turkey bacon is healthier anyway . Let the fatties be fatties.
Lludes 5
Turkey bacon is really good and so much healthier. I can eat pork but I prefer the turkey bacon.
jeremy_654321 7
the ****'s wrong with you!!?!?!
Samafilbeit 11
I think you got thumbed down for implying that Canadian bacon could hold a candle to "regular" bacon, not your religion or choice to eat it or not.
domolovesyoshi 33
You do realise that there bacon isn't all that bad for you if you cook it differently.
calenzelon 6
Wow first
bettyc4 26
I like how you changed from "Wow first " to just "Wow" after you saw you were 2nd. ='D
TheFamilyElf 17
You have every right to be upset! Bacon ain't a joke! Bacon is serious!
Mitcha857 0
Never get between a man and his bacon.
hthelittleone 10
I'd be pretty freakin upset, too. And I'm a girl!
mgkgambino 3
Amen
karkid619 8
Bacon strips and bacon strips and bacon strips and bacon strips and bacon strips and bacon strips and bacon strips. Oh and I forgot, bacon strips.
CaramelMacchiato 13
Lol, I read your comment and then looked at your photo. Oh, the irony :D
Jakesterk96 8
3-isn't*
TheFamilyElf 17
210- Please excuse me, next time I am shouting about bacon, I'll make sure I use the right conjunction.
yadisingh 5
210- It's ain't because ain't is actually considered a word now. But you're a Miami Heat fan, you spend too much time bandwagoning.
yellowman57 13
*isn't ain't is a ******* stupid word
Azail 15
You sir do not deserve any bacon for your correction. Also you are a failure of a troll if that was your intentions. So many people use ain't that it basically is a word so take your dictionary and shove it.
baconftw 9
Oh! That was you? Haha sucker!
onlychildFTW 34
This will seem like a stereotype, it is. Silly greedy fat Americans. And to answer your question OP. TONNES is wrong with your country.
AFCA020 4
Push her away and take her cart.. And yell: "my bacon!" ofcourse
RavenRiley007 4
Oooh Bacon...it brings the best out of people!
RandomComments 6
We take bacon, and add more bacon on it!
kdog333 1
#37, i think he means a fat woman not woman with a huge ass. just sayin.
deadrising084 1
269-have you even been to America? Because that shit ain't true and it's ignorant to say shit like that... So don't
mlj_ASW 0
That IS a ******* stereotype, dumbass. Not every American is fat. We like eating as much as the next country, thank you very much, but that doesn't mean we're all fat
prettypinkpixie 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You're better off without it.
MrSassypants 34
'Better' and 'without' shouldn't be in the same same sentence if it is about bacon. Unless the sentence is: "Bacon would not be better without more bacon!"
starbucksguy 16
Bacon should be made into its own food group...
PvtParts417 15
Nothing is better of without bacon
Demonfish 14
4- I feel sorry for you...
agm77 9
Bacon is a food group! The four basic food groups are: beans, bacon, whiskey, and lard.
starbucksguy 16
91:- You left out beer and peanut butter...other than that, pretty much spot on
GetKayotic 12
One cannot simply be better off without bacon
sonuskos 6
Nah thats not the 4 basic food groups. The 4 basics are bacon, bacon, bacon, and bacon.
lukemack 4
91 isn't that from disney Atlantis ?
prettypinkpixie 9
No wonder so many people are massively overweight...
skoob1 12
Unless its like a heart transplant... Hey doc, would you ever use bacon grease as an antibiotic?
FML_Master2133 6
Or: Life is better with bacon and worse without it. Still one sentence :)
ninjaniki 0
I don't know if anyone has told you, but bacon is a main food group. People have been known to go insane if they do not consume enough bacon in their diet...
onlychildFTW 34
Technically he is right. Bacon is bad for you. So is everything now a days. But in moderation, go for it!
DaniPandi 22
That sounds like walmart. Definitely.
joshaz 6
This sounds like ignorant, uneducated douche, defenitly.
Nutty4Muffs 3
The irony in 161s comment killed 3 or more babies today.
ttttttyyy 0
Them people of Walmart!
doctorhook86 25
She's just bringing home the bacon. That's what the feminists fought for, right?
shannonreneee 11
161, I don't know why people continue to call others dumb, uneducated or stupid and not check their spelling. Definitely*
Redoxx_fml 22
Shoulda called out "here piggy piggy!"
laden_swallow09 35
Cannibalism, FTW.
SkoomaKi 28
If you are what you eat, cannibals are the only real people.
Monjara 4
Though if you eat other people that are what they eat then you would be what those people eat...
Trix_Disorder 20
Then he would have no bacon, AND had his ass beat. :(
ttttttyyy 0
This little piggy made her house of bacon!
Z03y 7
#6 That reminded me of American horror story, episode 6 nonetheless.
Z03y 7
#6 That reminded me of American horror story, episode 6 nonetheless.
marsrover12 0
Lol that made me laugh
maosquare 18
I'd have broken out into BIG GIRL YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! Then stun her and everyone one in Walmart. And while they are all busy looking at you crazy sing, dance surreptitiously to her cart and steal all her bacon.
Suba_fml 8
Why wouldn't you get upset.
2ophiia 22
Honestly, regardless of what kind of food it was, I'd be pretty mad too if someone kicked my shopping cart down the isle and took all of whatever I was looking at.
totalloss 7
Dear god. Who left the bean stalk unguarded?
bettyc4 26
Between your hair and mine we are Christmas lol
totalloss 7
Lol Christmas colors ftw!
bettyc4 26
Don't get between fat people and their food. Very dangerous!
K_kanaka 26
Especially when theres bacon involved
starbucksguy 16
Don't get between fat people and anything, in fairness. It'll only end in tears...
ttttttyyy 0
And someone getting smushed!
starbucksguy 16
Or eaten
L1MEY 6
I would be offended if this wasn't true...
bluntbeak 6
You... Think it's strange to be upset? No. No my dear boy. We are talking about bacon here. You must exact your revenge.
DAHONKEY 0
How do u know thats a guy
Azail 15
Can't tell if sarcastic or just really, really stupid..