Today, I was puked on for the third time in three years at our annual choir concert. What makes it so significant? The fact that the same guy pukes on me every year from stage fright. We're arranged alphabetically, and he's always in the row RIGHT above me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that sitting in the third row at a 3D movie makes me vomit. Today I also found out that the big burly dude in front of me does not appreciate being vomited on. Now I feel nauseous and have a black eye. Not to mention I missed the last part of the movie. FML
Today, my theatre teacher made me go on stage even though I had a violent stomach flu. My understudies were unreachable, and she threatened to fail me if I did not perform. Halfway through the first act, I vomited on the first row. She failed me for letting the cast down. FML
Today, I performed in my school's choir concert. The girl next to me started to pass out, and I grabbed her so she wouldn't hit her head. After we were done performing and the curtains closed, my choir teacher dragged me off stage and said I was getting an F for "creating a distraction". FML
Today, I've managed to go my whole nine-year teaching career without anyone vomiting in my classroom. That record was broken today when someone vomited four successive times in front of a class of 46 students. It was me. FML
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I went to a concert. The music was great, but the drunk guys behind me made it hard to pay attention. Half way through the second act, one of them took it upon themselves to start peeing on me. FML
Today, I was planning to ask a guy at school out since I had mustered up the confidence to finally tell him how I really felt. I ended up puking on him. FML
Today, I swapped seats with someone on a ferry so she could sit next to her friend. Minutes later, a child sitting behind me threw up on my head, while the girl I had swapped with and her friend laughed hysterically as I attempted to wipe the puke from my hair. FML
Today, I was at a concert and I was having so much fun. Unfortunately, this was cut short when the person behind me with the worst halitosis started singing along to the songs. He knew ALL the lyrics. FML
Today, my name was left off of the program at our band concert. I would have been fine with this if it wasn't the third time in a row that this has happened. Yes, I did show them each time. FML
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Top comments
aback 5
Why do you keep showing up for that? Why do they keep him in the choir? It seems as though somebody could do something about it. If you're not willing to, then quit whining. And really, why haven't you given him a pre-emptive punch in the nuts by now?
sadistmonkey 19
Moreover, why are they arranged alphabetically??? This doesn't seem like a very good choir.
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Comments (152)
pinkdumbledore 0
ughhhh:( man that sucks!!! and first i think:)
boysxrulex09 0
YDI for being a great throw-up target. Are you really THAT ugly? Sheesh. But don't feel bad. There's plenty of other ugly people...
KumoFF7 3
Hi everyone! I'm new to this trolling thing so ima give it a try (: YDI FOR BEING A CHOIR GEEK!
Imawhalerider 0
He probably threw up just because he had to look at you again. haha jk sucks
kingofstuff 0
#39 is right. YDI for being a geek
iceblitz 0
I think you deserved it because I think you should expect it by the third time....The first time wouldve been a surprise, the second time wouldve also caught u off guard since it might be a one time thing, but the third time... nope
MyzticHydra 0
i agree even if you were put in alphabetical order you can ask the director to put him in the back where he can puke into a bag or something or move you so you wont get puked on simple solutions usually will work
organismal 0
YDI for not asking your director or teacher or whatever to change his/your spots. By the third time, you should figure that it would probably happen again.
CyclonePsycho 1
...You'd someone would have done something about it by now...
LexRB 0
agreed, go tell him to **** off and stop being a whiny ass dick head
diegogt 3
3075 people are atheist and believe ydi for being in a church.
Imawhalerider 0
And why did you go again?
aback 5
Why do you keep showing up for that? Why do they keep him in the choir? It seems as though somebody could do something about it. If you're not willing to, then quit whining. And really, why haven't you given him a pre-emptive punch in the nuts by now?
generalsmith2 0
all very good questions
artiststatement 21
You know, if she punched him in the nuts before he threw up, he'd probably be so distracted by the pain, he'd forget about his stage fright! Problem solved!
sadistmonkey 19
Moreover, why are they arranged alphabetically??? This doesn't seem like a very good choir.
yourlivessuck 0
I thought the exact same thing.
tubaguy42 0
that's why it's fake. it wouldn't be arranged alphabetically. choirs are organized sectionally (sopranos-tenor/bass/bari-altos), boy-girl-boy-girl for a nice blend, and by height so you can see everyone. i've never heard of an alphabetical choir - it makes no sense.
Irony_and_Ivory 1
If the person who is in charge doesn't know what they're doing, they might not be arranged properly. Especially in grade school. Everything was alphabetically arranged in grade school...
wootmoot 0
It's just from a school that doesn't give two ***** about its choir. It's not fake.
Subtext 10
And which kind of choir arranges their people alphabetically?!
getoveryourself 0
...or each section could be arranged alphabetically. Not that hard to figure out.
jorgitooo 0
HAHAHAHAHAHa
pandaloop 0
about time to invest in a rain poncho XD
AAAAHHHH12 2
That's exactly what I was going to say! xP
ndawgg 6
I was thinking an umbrella because it keeps the vomit at arms length. Also, most rain ponchos are plastic, and with plastic being a selectively permeable membrane (Put oil in a plastic bag and you can feel it on the outside) you'd still feel it even if the majority of the vomit was kept out. @OP: FYL.
FML_FYL_YDI 0
...And every year you hear him retching and don't move? Just because he's above you doesn't mean you can't dodge the puke.
9k5 0
I've puked without retching. :|
Emily9352 13
He probably doesn't have room to move. If they're lined up then he's probably in the middle of a whole choir.
kingkash 0
you'd think you'd be wearing a raincoat in prep for it....
darling_inwe 0
your director must be a jerk. -.-
Kiwi_Splash 0
C'est la vie.
cha40_fml 0
eh oui. c'est la vie. que voulez vous