Today, I was puked on for the third time in three years at our annual choir concert. What makes it so significant? The fact that the same guy pukes on me every year from stage fright. We're arranged alphabetically, and he's always in the row RIGHT above me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that sitting in the third row at a 3D movie makes me vomit. Today I also found out that the big burly dude in front of me does not appreciate being vomited on. Now I feel nauseous and have a black eye. Not to mention I missed the last part of the movie. FML
Today, my theatre teacher made me go on stage even though I had a violent stomach flu. My understudies were unreachable, and she threatened to fail me if I did not perform. Halfway through the first act, I vomited on the first row. She failed me for letting the cast down. FML
Today, I performed in my school's choir concert. The girl next to me started to pass out, and I grabbed her so she wouldn't hit her head. After we were done performing and the curtains closed, my choir teacher dragged me off stage and said I was getting an F for "creating a distraction". FML
Today, I've managed to go my whole nine-year teaching career without anyone vomiting in my classroom. That record was broken today when someone vomited four successive times in front of a class of 46 students. It was me. FML
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I went to a concert. The music was great, but the drunk guys behind me made it hard to pay attention. Half way through the second act, one of them took it upon themselves to start peeing on me. FML
Today, I was planning to ask a guy at school out since I had mustered up the confidence to finally tell him how I really felt. I ended up puking on him. FML
Today, I swapped seats with someone on a ferry so she could sit next to her friend. Minutes later, a child sitting behind me threw up on my head, while the girl I had swapped with and her friend laughed hysterically as I attempted to wipe the puke from my hair. FML
Today, I was at a concert and I was having so much fun. Unfortunately, this was cut short when the person behind me with the worst halitosis started singing along to the songs. He knew ALL the lyrics. FML
Today, my name was left off of the program at our band concert. I would have been fine with this if it wasn't the third time in a row that this has happened. Yes, I did show them each time. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
aback 5
Why do you keep showing up for that? Why do they keep him in the choir? It seems as though somebody could do something about it. If you're not willing to, then quit whining. And really, why haven't you given him a pre-emptive punch in the nuts by now?
sadistmonkey 19
Moreover, why are they arranged alphabetically??? This doesn't seem like a very good choir.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (152)
poopymonsters 0
ydi for having a name that starts with a letter you nerd
roundnproud 7
seems the best way to get an fml accepted on this site is to make it sound witty take notes guys
skullbuster 0
How did this end up on FML? Some ******* choir **** is afraid she is going to be assaulted by stage fright chunks again this year..??!?! @OP: I laughed when you said "what makes this so significant?" because, honestly, short of telling us that Barack Obama was blowing the guy while he vomitted - there was nothing you could have put in the following sentence to make this significant for any of us. Put your clothes in the washer, put on your big girl panties, and stop your whining!
lich_fml 0
Uh. Skip.
Mimi22_fml 0
YDI, cause I would have already whipped his ass the first time. he wouldn't have been stage freight anymore.
generalsmith2 0
first!
fmylifelooser 0
you mean, 99th!
Shyman4ever 0
Next time, bring a umbrella
Mylife_is_so_fd 0
next time eat his puke he will be so creeped out he will quit choir and realize how gay it really is
retardthinkswhat 3
lol! look forward to hearing from u next year.
xxALLISAUR 0
i would puke on him before he puked on you, so then he would quit and you would be barf free :)