Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML
Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML
Today, my 3 year old nephew was sitting on my knee at the computer. He was annoying me as he kept on pressing all the buttons. To scare him off I did a creepy voice in his ear that makes him cry. He turned round and broke my nose. FML
Today, I had dinner with my boyfriend's family. His 3-year-old nephew came running for a hug. At the last second, he darted past my arms and bit me on the ass. FML
Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML
Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML
Today, I was babysitting my 5 month-old nephew, who hasn't pooped in two days according to his mom. Well, he pooped. I accidentally stuck my finger in it. While I was wiping my finger off, he rolled over and peed on my new carpet. I rolled him over to clean the pee and he opened fire and pooped again. FML
Today, I was playing with my 5 year-old neighbor. I was changing and he saw me naked. Then he went home and his parents came over. Apparently, he told them that I have beautiful boobs. FML
Today, my 4 year-old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
triplebeerox 27
You definitely need to talk to the mom so she doesn't think you're molesting her kid
Johnnycake23 42
Kids are little demons!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (86)
swaggytooreal 2
Maybe u should stop molesting him ?
HollyPolly 19
oh my goodness, that's going to be quite the story to tell him when he's older!
SMHsohard 22
I HATE being tickled. A long-ago boyfriend thought it would be funny to hold me down and tickle me unmercifully, even after I told him to stop. He learned the hard way that wasn't a good idea. I kneed him in the nuts.
Shelblit69 15
The kid was probably taught to say that when he doesn't like a place someone's touching him. I'm sure his mom understands.
The_Skittish_One 27
As much that is a really poor way for him to have phrased it, I can't help wondering if he wasn't expressing true distress from being tickled. I HATED being tickled as a child and there was one girl in my class who kept doing it, even though I begged her to stop. Maybe he really didn't like being tickling, and for him it was a 'bad spot', just not in the way it sounded like.
nuh717 8
its nothing to feel bad about it, might be possible that arm pits as bad spots were taught by his mother. chill, feel confident :)
Johnnycake23 42
So many different opinions on this. I don't think I've seen a more diverse thread lol
lukian_fml 29
Kids say the darnedest things.
unlocked_ 9
He knew EXACTLY what he was doing lol trying to get you in serious trouble
Ray_of_midnight 23
I admit, the kid chose some unfortunate words to frame his complaint, but being tickled really bothers some people. Even three year olds have the right to bodily integrity, the right to set boundaries, and the right to have their "no" taken seriously.
iwadasn 33
...He's three. He can't just do whatever he wants. His parents need to have a serious talk with him about why he can't lie about people touching his "bad spots."
blackonblight 33
He isn't lying if he's being touched in a way or place that is distressing to him. It's something even kids show's like "the big comfy couch" cover. Tickling isn't nice if you don't want it. It's unwanted touching.
Ray_of_midnight 23
#67 I realize we have an honest and reasonable difference of opinion here, but my first reaction is not that he's lying, it's that he made an unfortunate choice of words without being fully aware of what the phrase "touched me in a bad spot" means to an older child, or to an adult. I don't doubt that he's made uncomfortable by tickling and doesn't like it, and, if that's the case, his "No" should be respected.
TallMist 32
#67 Are you saying the kid has no right to say "No" to being tickled? Even if it hurts them or feels totally uncomfortable to them? And yes, tickling CAN hurt. Just because you're laughing does NOT mean you're having a good time.