Today, my 4 year-old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML
Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to tickle my daughter's foot, which she hates. One bloody nose, multiple scratches and 4 toe-shaped bruises later, she's the one laughing. FML
Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML
Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
Today, my uncle picked up a tissue box and threw it at my sister for fun. My sister got mad and yeeted the box at me. I reacted with the same action, but she lost her crap and kicked and punched me. When I reported the incident to my parents, I get berated and my sister got away with it. FML
Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML
Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML
Today, my 3 year old nephew was sitting on my knee at the computer. He was annoying me as he kept on pressing all the buttons. To scare him off I did a creepy voice in his ear that makes him cry. He turned round and broke my nose. FML
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Top comments
Hempseed 27
Preach back at him about how he should respect your daughters boundaries and tell him to stop tickling her. He wants child discipline? Discipline him.
tounces7 28
Sounds like he's the one who lacks self-control. Even a 4 year old child deserves to be respected if they want someone to stop.
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Comments (43)
Hempseed 27
Preach back at him about how he should respect your daughters boundaries and tell him to stop tickling her. He wants child discipline? Discipline him.
tounces7 28
Sounds like he's the one who lacks self-control. Even a 4 year old child deserves to be respected if they want someone to stop.
ajh1800 25
Tell him that stop means stop, even if its from a 4 year old. And let him know that every action has a consequence, whether positive OR negative. He just happened to get the negative end of the stick.
BurnInDemonFire 39
He sounds like a creep. If that smack didn't make him stop, smack him again, but with something bigger, like a bus.
Alup132 22
Not that I don’t agree, but I think a bus is larger than a bat.
BurnInDemonFire 39
No. A baseball bat is a short-term solution. A bus would get the message across quickly, and permanently.
regi13 8
He deserved it.
Melissa Turton 7
Your uncle sounds like a pedophile... maybe you should tell him he wouldn’t get punched if he kept his hands to himself.
JackFaire 27
*Sighs* Things like this are so no helpful. It's actually super normal to ignore the wishes of a child around that age when it comes to tickling, wrestling etc. It's not a sign of pedophilia it's actually a sign of normal adults who don't seem to understand consent. The same normal adults that touch pregnant women's bellies without asking. There is nothing sexual in it for them they're just told it's okay. If we immediately jump from "unwanted touching" to "that means you're a pedophile" then all those people hear is "well I'm not a pedophile so I'm going to keep doing it" This is a consent issue and that's how it needs to be treated. "You're failing to ask her consent to tickle her she's made it clear she doesn't like that and you're ignoring it" Telling every person "you're" or "they're" a pedophile is like telling every kid "Weed will kill you" then when they realize you're full of crap they won't believe anything else you say either. If the OP goes to the uncle with "You're a pedophile" he'll think "well no I'm not" and promptly dismiss anything else the clearly idiotic person says. Also there is a difference between a child molester and a pedophile.. The latter has urges towards children whether or not they have acted on them. The former has acted on them. Both tend to avoid any interactions with children that others would mistake for sexual interest in a child. The molester then finds ways to get the child alone or groom them. Tickling them would rarely be a go to move. At least outside of a Hollywood movie.
RichardPencil 32
Tell him his expertise is not in child discipline, but molestation!
DoctorPALO 14
YDI. If you knew she was getting annoyed, YOU should have put a stop to it. PARENT UP!!!
mssileas 25
Ok a grown man not stopping touching my 4yo daughter against her will? I wouldn't have waited for my daughter to defend herself, but whatever. I hope it hurt when she punched him and I hope next time you back her up earlier.
JackFaire 27
In this context if a mother reacted most of the rest of the family would have been all, "Oh my god overreact much he was only tickling her what is wrong with you" The idea that children can consent or withhold consent is completely alien to our society. We built many of our laws on the idea that children under certain ages are incapable of consenting to anything. Attitudes are changing but not quickly. The same person who on Monday might comment on this being bad might on Tuesday tell their son to get over the fact he doesn't like his brother tackling him.
Iamthebanzai22 21
Your daughter is a ******* legend!!! Please give her a high five from me. You won't always be there to protect her but you did teach her to stand up for herself and that is as good as it gets. Pedophiles choose their targets carefully and she aint prey. Oh, and your uncle can go **** himself.
Denita House 5
me too!!!
dreamingwolf1981 7
He deserved it. I have a 4 yr old and I taught her to give a warning if it foesnt work regulate. Never too young for self defense.