Today, I was on my way home on an airplane. The guy I had to sit next to was reading a book with naked girls in it. About 15 minutes into the flight, he had an erection and started to giggle. It was a 2 hour flight. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as a flight attendant, I had to deal with a passenger staring at a stewardess constantly and masturbating. His wife was sitting next to him and didn't mind. FML
Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML
Today, while on a six hour flight, someone offered to pay me $20 to swap seats with them. It seemed like a great deal, so I immediately accepted and moved to my new seat. I didn't realize my new neighbor was an old man with a raging boner. FML
Today, I was on a flight from Chicago to Minneapolis. A rather attractive young lady sitting next to me fell asleep at the beginning of the flight. About 40 minutes into the flight I noticed my fly was open. The lady woke to me with my hands in my crotch struggling to zip up my fly. FML
Today, within the first 15 minutes of a nonstop 8-hour flight, the guy sitting next to me picked an eyelash he found on my face, stared at it for a few seconds, and stuck it in his mouth. FML
Today, on the airplane, the kid behind me kicked my seat hundreds of times, while the big bald guy next to me farted deadly ones repeatedly. I was on a non-stop 14-hour flight. FML
Today, I was at the airport walking around, killing time. There was a man about twenty years older than me who kept on eyeballing me, and it really wasn't flattering. I get on the plane and guess who I get to sit next to. FML
Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML
Today, I was on a flight and one of my friends was sitting next to this woman who happened to be sleeping with her mouth wide open. My friend decided to take a picture. While I was editing it, a man sitting behind us said "If you want to take a picture of my girlfriend, wait until she's awake". FML
Today, while using the bathroom on an airplane, someone walked in on me wiping my butt. That person just so happened to be the stranger I was sitting next to. It was an 8 hour flight. FML
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Top comments
hairt 4
when you land remember to...... hide yo kids, hide yo wife, and hide your husband coz they're rapin' errbody out there!
tpea 1
Did you enjoy the book? ;)
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Comments (144)
imright24 0
If you weren't interested, you wouldn't have been looking and wouldn't have known. YDI.
S3xualyAttractiv 0
You know the saying "couldn't help but notice" I'm sure one may apply that in thus situation <3
hairt 4
when you land remember to...... hide yo kids, hide yo wife, and hide your husband coz they're rapin' errbody out there!
RachelHellYeah 0
lmmfao! That made me laugh!! I love that song btw...
cbr600_fml 0
hahaha 23 winnn!!!!!!!
inRedemption 0
lmfao haha rape song FTW
I_iz_special 0
WIN
Efilyn 0
Win. <333
SpicyDuck 22
Best comment, hands down. Looks like we have a plane intruder.
anquilla 2
lololol
hairt 4
=P
blondie105 0
#23: that made me laugh sooo hard !!!
bauerd 0
I could only imagine when he has to climb over you to goto the bathroom. you could lose an eye.
nerdsgetmehot 23
Sorry, OP! That must have been a little disturbing for you. I know I would have been freaked out!
puffcream 0
same, so scary
aardvarkish 17
I would have had to go to the john so I could laugh my ass off. I bet he sounded like Porky Pig!
Cinn_fml 23
You'd want to make sure you locked the door just in case he got any ideas :P
manbearpig5567 0
heyyyyy ur hot ima nerd, where u from (state)
nerdsgetmehot 23
#41 Haha! I would have gone in the bathroom to hide... #44 Ack! It would be even scarier if he decided to follow someone into the bathroom. :P #63 Far, far away from you.
rnett08 5
hahahaha 63 DENIDE :)
anorexicbarbie 8
hahahahah 80 ILLITERATE :)
RachelHellYeah 0
I think his giggling would creep me out the most...
taybowden 2
lmaO! we know he can't last long! hahaha;)
Zealoushalfling 0
Did you help him out with his problem? I'm sure he'd be grateful.
MacNuggets 0
lmao @23 lol
yusaku02 20
2 hours isn't that long...
ngyh 0
try to turn him off!