Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML
Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML
Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML
Today, I found pictures in my boyfriend's phone of our dog eating treats out of my mouth while I'm sleeping. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting for him to get out of the shower. Bored, I sent my friend a picture of myself pretending to make out with his bear rug. After the photo shoot, I looked in the doorway to find his dad staring at me. FML
Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I was frantically searching for my cell phone. He was curious as to what I was doing so I told him. There was long silence followed by laughter. He could hardly breathe as he told me, "Honey you're on your phone talking to me." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend was laying down on top of me and he was looking at me with passion in his eyes. I thought he was finally going to tell me that he loved me. Instead, he said, "You have a booger." FML
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Top comments
gatorsxrule 0
lol I can see myself doin that
slack3r9 0
what can you say? bacon is just THAT good
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Comments (249)
MeganH0LLYW00D 0
Wrap yourself up in bacon and give him what he wants bitch!
jollyholly414 0
I personally don't like bacon so I think that sucks...
happylittleman 0
You don't like bacon? ....are you sick?
spirited_away33 0
#53, don't be an idiot. I get that you were trying to be funny, but it didn't work. some people don't like bacon. I've had it once in my life.
wafflemonger 0
141, how's being a buzzkill working out for you, Buzz Killington?
bongoboy 0
Lmao, things to wrap in bacon! lol!
sallay 0
reminds me of that simpsons episode where homer wraps a stick of butter in bacon and gets a heart attack lmfao.
bananamanama 0
I bet that's where he got the idea.
wheresmyvodka 0
So? What's the problem? Bacon kicks ass.
BBGood_fml 0
I would be doing that and I'm a women...but I would do cupcakes or ranch
mylifeisfuckedd 0
#34 you're a women??
ohhandrea 0
too bad its woman
plexico 4
He was just getting ready to pork you!
lastminuteperm 0
So?!? This is just stupid. I hate spolied brats who only want to be focused on them when their doing something. I get how it is bad, and it was a dumbass thing for him to do but can't you take a hint? Your a bad kisser!
SeventhFonons 0
You obviously don't know what humor is
sundlun 0
****
afj67 0
at least he cooks! bacon wrapped food is delicious....
soulmeetsbody522 0
LOL. oh lord. that is too funny.