Today, I was involved in a debate. Things got out of control, insults were hurled, and by the end friends were lost. The subject of the debate? Whether snot has enough calories in it to be nutritional. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a heated debate about climate change. I got so flustered that I forgot the word "volcano" and ended up calling them "exploding mountain things". End of the debate. Shame. FML
Today, my friend went on a lengthy rant about how people are "healthy at any size" and I need to embrace fat pride, after I said I intend to lose weight to alleviate my digestive and breathing troubles. Apparently her activist forum knows more about my health than my own doctor. FML
Today, I was hanging out with my friends, and we got the idea to do some improv comedy together for a laugh. Barely two minutes into our fake political debate, everyone had apparently forgotten it was all a joke. Raging ensued, and a vicious fight quickly followed. FML
Today, my debate partner repeatedly said "You mad, bro?" to the opposing team in our college debate class. That debate was worth a considerable portion of our grade. FML
Today, I had a debate at school. I had diligently studied my position, digging up historical parallels, researching the economics, and preparing citations. I lost to a guy who just yelled, "Tax the billionaires" to every question. FML
Today, I was arguing with a friend over whether or not I'm fat. She kept telling me that I was. Angry, I sat down on the chair beside her. It broke. FML
Today, I got into a heated argument with my girlfriend. Not because of anything I did, but because she actually believes that pasteurization is when a pastor blesses a dairy product. "You know, like kosher." FML
Today, to prevent a fistfight at work, I had to mediate a contested debate between two coworkers on what was evidently a very touchy subject: Which is better, the orange creamsicle or the ice cream sandwich? I was the only one to get in trouble for wasting company time. FML
Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML
Today, I made a healthy, delicious dinner. My girlfriend picked at it until it went cold, then stuck it in the fridge. Later, she devoured a giant bowl of sugary cereal, then complained all night that her stomach hurt. This happens a lot. FML
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Top comments
jet223 20
So. Don't leave us hanging. Is it?
jet223 20
Well actually snot itself does not boost your immune system but rather it is the first response of the immune system. The first response is not antigen specific and just keeps out all intruding substances. The mucus traps the bacterium and then sends it out via the nose and that is why it is not smart to swallow or sniff back in your mucus.
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Comments (74)
thaqueen_fml 15
And I thought my friends and I got in some dumb fights.
jade3424 21
You guys are idiots
iheartbreak 8
It does not. It costs your body energy to create mucous. A very fundamental law of thermodynamics states you can't get more than what was put in
pandor_fml 24
Yeah but I think they mean does it as an end product have any energy in it... Oh god I think I see how this all started
ohSNAPyall 27
You're assuming they're eating their own snot bahahahaha
ChristinePi 36
Reminds me of the argument involving the health benefits of semen. In order to start seeing results you'd have to be consuming a lot of it.
IsThisTakenToo 16
As gross as it is, snot can be good for you. Did you know hamsters eat their own poop, to get the nutrients from it.
IsThisTakenToo 16
Well...within reason.
Hauclir 14
The amount of calories does not make something nutritional.
worldclassrager 41
Maybe health class would be a good idea to take
chuchusheep 19
i could see how friends could be lost from that...
Treaton 5
that was so bad that it became funny xD
brycemash 9
Screw healthy im hungry